Blank Noise Blogathon

The Blank Noise Project is having a blog-a-thon on March 7th, 2006 to spread awareness of street sexual harassment.

Leaving aside my objections to BNP and its branch of militant feminism, the cause is worthwhile and some posts, which transcend street harassment and talk about sexual harassment in general are worth reading— making you uneasy and at the same time stunning you into silence by their explosive nature.

There is not much for me to say about this topic that has not been said more eloquently and more fervently elsewhere. However one wonders—do blogathons really help the harassed woman on the streets? Do roadside Romeos read my blog? And would reading this change them in any way?

44 thoughts on “Blank Noise Blogathon

  1. GB,
    It might not change the roadside romeos, but it can atleast change the mindset of the women who write the posts or read them. It helps to find out that you are not the only one who has suffered and may give many women atleast a little bit more courage to fight against harassment.

  2. do blogathons really help the harassed woman on the streets?

    The harassed woman on the streets is no different from the one who blogs…it helps to share experiences, create an awareness..for the men too…not all of them really know what women go through…it would be great if even a small percentage of the men who read these take it upon themselves to stand up and do something the next time he sees a woman on the road/in a bus being harassed.

  3. @Dreamweaver:I think most women know that there arent the only ones who have faced harassment. Let me qualify that: most women who are educated enough to read blogs.

    @Shub: Again the section of men who dont know—the ones who think that women enjoy the experience (a misconception promoted by the Hindi film industry) —dont usually have the education to blog/read blogs. Then there are men who do know…the educated ones …and these people harass fully cognizant of the deletrious effects of their actions. These people arent also going to change just by reading a few blogs.

  4. almost all women face harrassment and sometimes at a very early age .my child going for her lawn tennis session at 6 am noticed a man exhibiting himself unzipped . 11 yr old not knowing whether it was somehow her fault yet having the faith that she cud tell me anything she hysterically poured out the story.also that her friend had been noticing that for a longer time had been afraid to tell anyone .tried to find the rascal in vain.talked at length to my daughter but still donot know how that affects her.when i told her friends mom she says the sooner girls grow up to this the better bcos sexual harrassment is really inevitable ………..road, bus or workplace

  5. I have seen one guy coming out and walking to and fro in the 2nd floor balcony busy talking over the mobile phone and looking constantly at the girls’ PG right opposite to his apartment, in only his underwear……evening after evening. The girls (at least a few of them) seemed to enjoy this in the beginning but later someone complained to the landlord who stays somewhere else. The guy got thrown out of the place.

  6. GB, I’m curious why you think the BNP is well characterized as militant feminism. In what respect is it militant?

    I just want to clarify that militant feminism generally refers (in a derogatory way) to radical feminism, a distinct ideological school which, to the best of my knowledge, the Blank Noise Project has nothing to do with.

  7. Hi, i heard about ur blog from many of my frnds, so i wanted to check it out myself. I should say this-Its a great blog. keep blogging. Very interesting posts.
    Diana

  8. You probably posted this out of solidarity with the cause. Hoping this is the first( and last !!) bland post from you. We anyday prefer you choosing a topic of your own discretion and the erudite take that follows. Hoping to see you soon at your wittiest best !!!

  9. GB
    Maybe most women know that they are not the only ones who face harassment, but even among “educated ones” who read blogs, there are many who take it silently and don’t have the courage to retaliate. Just so that you don’t laugh away the existence of such meek women as my imagination, I was part of the group of silent women till recently. If this kind of initiative atleast serves to give courage to a few women, I would thik that it has served its purpose.

  10. I am glad you find my posting worth a read. Also, I am happy to see that I could transfer the emotion across, through words.

    Thanks for linking me here.

  11. YOURFAN writes:

    The harassment that females face is all pervasive and as old as the oldest profession. So there is nothing new. Of curse that does not mean that there should not be any awareness programs. I agree with Dreamweaver’s opinion.

    Females who use Internet (also read blogs) face harassment if they decide to chat. The first harassment is to be asked about the age. Why is age an important factor to anybody for chatting? Either you like what she says or not over the chat – which is the only factor whether to continue to chat with her or not. But the minute one goes on a chat line, she is bombarded with queries about her age as if she is on a matrimonial site.

    There are other forms of harassment on the Net. Quite a few men/boys first make it a point to be very polite and friendly to earn the trust of a female. Then if she trusts him to be a genuinely nice person and gives her email, viola, she is in for pornographic emails. I am sure you must have read that in US sexually deviant men use Net to harass female. We in India are not lagging behind in this respect.

    I always feel that instead of spending so much money and energy on women’s emancipation, that money and energy should go to teach men folks how to treat and behave with ladies with dignity – socially, emotionally, physically and of course sexually.

  12. Arnab: Your post “Goodbye Sourav” had an anonymous comment that said “Let it go…It is done”, to which you replied “Hello Debashish. Long time no see (it’s you isnt it?)…”.
    Please do clarify if I was the Debashish you were referring to. Sorry for being off-topic here but I guess you are no longer replying to comments on that post.

  13. @Varsha: Just sick. I mean people who do that in front of children deserve to get their genitals ripped apart.

    @Dev: Oh yes such stories are common…unfortunately. Had some one like this in my old neighbourhood.

    @Raghu: Because they put the label “pervert” on anyone whom they consider is ogling them. I have written in some detail in one my old blogposts linked on this blogpost.

    @Dina Sahu: Thank you

    @Amit: I understand. Its just that I didnt want to go on about BNP and my objections to them because after all the issue of street harassment is much more important and on a day designated as a special one for the cause, criticizing BNP would be petty carping.

    @Dreamweaver: Well if this initiative had motivated you to take a stance, then it has been worth it most certainly.

    @Premlatha: Shocking that such an “eminent” man could be like this…just shocking…and thanks for sharing

    @yourfan: Ahem. Now is asking your age on chat a form of harassment? You are free to not to reply to anyone who says a/s/l . And for some “age” may be important to chatting—after all there are people of all sorts with different kind of intentions on chat. The problem with street harassment is that unlike chat you cannot just close the window or press “Ignore”—the problem literally follows you.

    @Debashish: I am sorry if I was wrong or trying to be smart but that comment came from a location where I presumed you are from. Since you are the only person who visits from that city (till date) and since you have echoed similar sentiments before, I made the supposition. I apologize if you are not.

  14. Reading a number of posts and comments in this blog and elsewhere and hearing a few personal accounts from acquaintances it is refreshing to see that women are slowly but gradually shedding the “meek” image and getting tougher. However, the meekness factor needs to be addressed by a whole group of males too.

    Not too many years ago, in a train to Delhi, I witnessed a group of 7-8 men (daily passengers who, of course got in the reserved compartment in some station in U.P.)tormenting this couple who looked like newly weds. Nothing direct but sleazy jokes, Dada Khondke dialogs, unnecessary references to female body parts in their conversations… the works. All the time glancing at the lady with this sleaziest of grins on their faces. A compartment full of men… but not a word of protest from any. After a few minutes I just couldn’t take it anymore. I asked them to cut it out. “Ab rehene bhi do”… that’s all I said. What followed was pretty heavy beating and kicking by three of those men. Yeah, eventually, I was rescued by the other passengers but what amazed me was first of all, 20-25 men in the near vicinity didn’t utter a word of protest when these guys were harrassing the woman and then they let the beating go on for some time before they decided to intervene and lastly, even when they intervened their attitude towards these hoodlums was “bahut ho gaya hai, ab chhor so” (that’s enough, now let him go). Evidently, balls are rare commodities. Anyhoo, I guess I had ruined the “mood” of those gentlemen since they went elsewhere after their macho act.
    The bottomline is besides women turning away from being meek, I think we guys need to go quite a distance as well. And I think this kind of initiatives help in increasing the awareness and will motivate some people to take some action when they witness such incidents in future . Some writers will go to the extremes, which most readers will be able to detect. However, most of the experiences are genuine.

  15. Harrassed women on the streets also include women who read blogs. Blogging about harrassment does create awareness, talks about things that we can or should do like Annie’s (http://knownturf.blogspot.com/2006/03/streets-stories-strategies.html)& Hemangini’s (http://hemanginigupta.blogspot.com/2005/06/train-to-chennai.html) posts.

    “Do roadside Romeos read my blog? And would reading this change them in any way?”
    I doubt but even if a few of us did what Amit (http://indiauncut.blogspot.com/2006/03/of-many-violations.html) suggests, roadside or not, romeos will think twice before trying anything smart.

    P.S. You have a great blog here.
    P.P.S. Apologize for adding so many links in the comment but since u get so many visitors on your site, more ppl will get to read them.

  16. Well, I didn’t post that comment. I think I am the only commenter on your blog who spells his name Debas-h-ish, so I was pissed off – but I felt that comment was too brief and arbitrary for anyone to draw conclusions as to its source so I decided to confirm first rather than let loose with something rude.. and it seems there indeed was “circumstantial evidence” that led you to your supposition – although I’m still a bit indignant that you thought I would hide behind an anon identity. Btw, I was in India for the last 3 weeks and only returned to that city last evening – partly that’s the reason for the “Long time no see”; not that I would necessarily have had anything new to comment on the Ganguly issue anyway.

  17. @Debasish: Aamazingly brave of you to do that–but people like you are rare. I wonder how many bloggers who are writing everywhere “men should take a stance” are actually going to take it when push comes to shove. Men like you are rare.

    @Reena: Your comment passed into moderation (subsequently approved) because more than 2 links in a comment flag it as potential spam. Appreciate the links.

    @Debashish (with an “h” as in Venezuela): Aaah no wonder I never saw you anymore—I thought you had stopped visiting my humble dwelling.

  18. Nice to catch you again since you left bloggers. Here is motley of comments from my side.

    1.On whether sexual harassers can be prevented by writing about them on blogs, my point is, like some other commentators in this comment space, that nothing can cure this disease at the snap of finger tips. Any sort of awareness drive is appreciated. Additionally, sharing experiences with others gives the victim the courage to deal with the matter more decisively. This makes sense, as, in many cases after such incident the victim sinks into mental trauma, sometimes feels ashamed of herself for something she is not at all responsible for . On the other hand, as members of blogging community, this is the only way we can rise to the occasion and very emphatically announce to the abusers, “Hey, we hate you, we hate you like we do that to nobody else.”

    2.Will you please stop awhile and correct the typo “spead”?

    3.The wordpress template and the other stuffs are cool. But two serious problems I observed which are apparently not present on bloggers. Just click on my name. Impersonation and repudiation seem to be major weaknesses of this software. An abuser can wreak havoc with these vulnerabilities. Anyway my actual link is this.

  19. @Akash: What a coincidence…I was going to write a post on the recent bombings and guess who drops by. Thanks for pointing out the typo…though seriously are a few typos that irritating to you once you get the sense?

    Since this is not a site for e-commerce, I am not majorly concerned about impersonation and repudiation. It logs your IP though—something blogger did not do. It also, by default, requires a valid email id (a setting I removed) because some other commenters had the opposite concern—they felt it disallowed true anonymity.

  20. Hi Arnab,

    My sincere thanks for the information on BNP. I went through as many of their postings as I could in a feverish pace and I could relate to most of them. Its very hard for women to come out and talk about sexual abuse, whether at home or on the street, whether in the hands of strangers or loved ones…usually they are made to believe that it was all their fault! So we all learn to keep secrets. I kept some secrets for more than three decades…and finally they are out ( http://www.nottinautilus.blogspot.com/) I’m not ashamed anymore. I wrote the piece and then I cried…for a long time…it was very cathartic!

    Yesterday was for skeletons tumbling out of closets. My husband told me about the time he was abused by an older boy in school! My husband was 12 and this boy about 16!! So you see, its not just girls who are vulnarable…any body who is perceived to be weak and defenceless will face some kind of abuse or the other!!

  21. Arnab,
    I do not want to give an impression to anybody that I was trying to project myself as this overtly brave person. Because I am actually not. I am just a run of the mill, ordinary person with a little bit of a backbone. I had never expected the incident to take quite that turn. My point was that I actually expected the other men in the compartment to back me once I took the initiative. Even I waited for a few minutes before I said anything, right? So, somebody needed to take that first step. I have no issues with that. But the inaction from everybody around afterwards was mind boggling. And many of these people were in groups, not alone!
    I was shit scared when the beating and kicking started and it still scares me a bit. I can never forget that incident. And, I have a very long memory and I think I am a little revengeful in nature… can’t let go of things… what a pretty picture I am painting of myself, huh? I have played it in my mind for years on how many different ways I could have handled it. For example, I had made acquaintances with 4-5 guys from BHU in the next compartment just a few hours ago and they definitely looked tougher than me. I have thought of the option that perhaps I should have got them over and dealt with the situation that way. I am pretty sure they would have joined me. I would and I know scores of people who would. Instead, in my myopic youthfulness, didn’t plan anything at all. But I guess, I have become a bit more dangerous now. Because next time I face a similar situation, I am really going to do some serious plotting to handle the situation more efficiently and at the same time, try to return some of my unpaid kicks.
    Not fair to the future eve teasers? Well, life was a bitch for me that day, then it will be for them. Am I going to do it more because of my own issues than for the sole, noble reason of saving some girl/woman from sexual harrassment? I think only a shrink will be able to answer that but ask a target of such harrassment and see if she cares.

  22. Hi there- ‘the militant feminist speaks’:

    about roadside romeos. yes they exist, and they could be anyone, anyone driving, cycling, on a bike, blogger, ceo, paan wala

    who knows, the roadside romeo we dont recognize could be reading it

    on the other hand, this blog-a-thon is not only towards ‘perpetrators’, it hopes to address the issue and understand its complexity through all of us, those who experience it, who see it, who know it.

    thanks for writing!

  23. @GB: Not a question of irritation. Just a tinge of discomfort. If someone organizes his blog with so much care in view of the comfort of the reader, then the reader has some responsibility to help him by bringing to notice what might have been overlooked unintentionally.

    Anyway, I think that tracing of IP address compromises anonymity more than the knowledge of email-id. A case in point is that my name, email id, as recorded in my profile, do not reveal anything about my real identity. However, my IP-address reveals my present location unmistakably — something the reader may not want.

    @nautilus: It helps to blow off steam if you can work up the spunk to share your experience with others. Hope that this blogging is able to provide a trusted platform for that.

    @Debasish: quite laudable act by you. But blaming all the fellow passengers who did not protest the same way as you did may prove to be a little harsh on some. One of my friends who once witnessed a girl being harassed by a gang of rowdies in a bus could not really gather the courage on the spot to voice his disapproval. But I know that, for a long time after the incident, he had been quite upset about himself for not being able to resist the perpetrators. Now, so far as I know, he writes regularly in some magazines or so on topics related to sexual abuses against women. I am sure that the incident left some indelible impression on him. It is also important to recognize and appreciate such gestures otherwise their genuine feelings will be hurt and it would be difficult to involve wide spectrum of people in the fight. All people are not born the same. The ways of protests may differ.

  24. “do blogathons really help the harassed woman on the streets?”

    Oh yes they do! Because most take it lying down, dont know how to react or dont have the courage to. Maybe because it makes them feel dirty about themselves or maybe because they might in turn be blamed for “inviting” it or whatever..I think many women *need* to be educated that they arent the only ones going thru shit every single day of their life and that they dont need to take it either! (believe me most of them don’t know that they can actually protest against it, it’s so taken for granted)

    “Do roadside Romeos read my blog? And would reading this change them in any way?”
    Dunno about your readership, but then there are definitely ppl in the educated class who also do things like this. (by “this” I dont simply mean harmless things like whistling, winking, singing lewd songs; I actually mean sexual harassment). Some have the guts to admit it and some don’t. Also, if guys who dont indulge in such stuff, also become aware and decide to do something the next time they see it happening, that would make things a lot better (hopefully).

  25. Just a passing thought- it would be interesting to know “Kabyo Kabolito Kabindranath”‘s take on this.

  26. To begin with, I share GB’s objections to BNP and agree with what he said in that post on “looking”. But like he said, the issue of street harassment is an important one and I am curious how many people share my perspective.

    As soon as males reach puberty, there is an automatic strong desire for sexual contact with females (and vice versa I am pretty sure, maybe slightly less strong, but that is for females to state). Indian society is still quite conservative, where opportunities for males to satisfy these desires to any extent whatsoever (before marraige) with a willing partner are hard to come by. Therein, IMO, lies the root cause of the unwanted physical contact so many women are subject to in public places.

    Here, I would like to digress a little bit and add that I think the difficulty in finding willing partners nowadays can almost completely be attributed to any potential partner’s fear of backlash and unwarranted inferences about her “character” from various quarters (including her own parents) if her activities become public knowledge (just look at all the brouhaha in the DPS case). To some extent, a conservative upbringing and environment (“Sex before marraige is a sure sign of bad character and no good girl should indulge in it”) also has its effect on some individuals. I believe the most of the better educated Indian males don’t do anything more than curse this sorry state of affairs while not giving up their quest for a willing partner – and for college students in the larger cities etc it is not too difficult.

    Now to get back to the root cause, among the less educated and/or less “intellectual” (can’t think of the right word) Indian males, it seems a larger number of them think there is nothing wrong in getting whatever they can in any way they can, even if it involves physical contact completely unwanted by the other party. The possibility (and probably sometimes even the idea) of relationships/encounters with willing partners that could satisfy their desires are alien to them. Street harassment is one of the most visible manifestations of a social mindset that largely considers premarital celibacy to be a virtue and any premarital sexual contact (and often even romance) for females to be a sign of “bad character”.. I think it encourages frustrated males to be predatory and women to be submissive and shameful – since blame often falls on females for any incident (or even “looking” that betrays desire) that violates this supposed virtue.

    To those who disagree with me I would point out the far lesser degree of street harassment in the more sexually free societies where so many young women dress far more “provocatively”. I also think that the lack of shame and no need for any kind of secretiveness regarding expression of sexual desires in the more open societies makes it quite difficult to sexually harass someone by “looking”, even if the looker so desires. Gaurav Sabnis’ post on his blog describes an incident that is indictaive of this.

  27. Debashish,

    I completely agree. Part of the problem lies in the whole ‘sex is taboo’ attitude in india, which produces millions of frustrated men who then go onto target any female who may pass by – she may be 6, 16 or 46 – it doesn’t matter. In my few years of living in uk, i have felt much safer travelling alone even after dusk and wearing western clothes, than i have ever felt in delhi in broad daylight wearing ‘behnji’ type clothes accompanied by other female friends. I can only ascribe it to the fact that the men in western countries will approach and find willing partners instead of leching and preying on unwilling ones. That’s not to say that rape or molestation does not occur in western countries. But it sure invokes much more public opinion and legal action than in india. And street harassment is taken seriously as a punishable offence. Unlike in india where it is rampant and yet mostly ignored.

  28. GB, maybe not those roadside romeos, but you’d be surprised if we tell you how many super-educated men behave the same way when they get the chance. the very kind who’d read blogs.

  29. Have you ever had to hold a bag across your chest or go over your wardrobe before you leave for your day at work just to make sure you don’t attract any unwanted attention which you invariably *will* attract just because of your gender? The worst part of my day is my ride to work because I have to deal with railway stations which means dealing with hordes of men who think it’s okay to look at me lasciviously, to mentally undress me, to stare intently at my breasts, my butt, my arms, my legs, knowing fully well that it’s making me intensely uncomfortable. Doesn’t it make you uncomfortable when you catch someone staring at you and they still don’t look away? Imagine that happening about 10 times every day. Imagine that those stares are sexually charged. Imagine that person getting some kind of wicked satisfaction from your discomfort. Imagine trying desperately to look away because you’re afraid of what will happen next – a lewd comment? a vulgar gesture? a bold grope? more staring? Imagine the impudence being gifted with impunity. Imagine that happening day in and day out.

    GB, with all due respect, there is absolutely nothing “militant” about believing that staring lecherously is a form of sexual harassment. I’m not talking about quick glances or “once-overs” or being “appreciated” for being attractive. I’m talking about the kind of stares that are blatantly sexual, deliberately disempowering, impossibly unnerving. I don’t think it’s too radical to believe that women have the right to be spared that constant fear, humiliation and feeling of powerlessness.

  30. Oooh all these harassed females….bo hoo. Giving you a once-look over is fine because it boosts your ego but looking persistently is threatening and so is bad. Look here, you cannot call the shots and define boundaries. I like to look at cleavages and bouncing breasts and swaying asses. And guess what I have every friggin right. Just as the right you have to wear a short skirt. So stop all this moaning and groaning: decent people are getting bombed to extinction and all that gets you wet (with sweat) is the autowallah who stares at your bosom. Gimme a break.

  31. Pranav,

    you are assuming that every woman who is ‘moaning and groaning’ about harrassment likes to dress in short skirts and is otherwise looking for an ego boost. then how do you explain sexual harassment of 9 – 10 year olds? are they also exposing cleavages and ‘bouncing breasts’ and ‘swaying asses’? and what about burkha clad women? (yes, they TOO get harassed) or middle aged ladies (remember the incident of a 60 lady getting raped a few years ago?)

    let me assure you the % of women on the roads in western wear is small, % scantily clad women – miniscule. the average indian commuting woman is your next-door neighbour, your mother/sister/girlfriend/wife/daughter – who may be very decently dressed in saris/salwar kameez. and yet that does not spare them from lewd remarks/blatant stares/ groping or the fear of much worse.

    i sympathise deeply with your female relatives. coz god forbid if they ever faced a similar situation (which is not as unlikely as you may wish, given the present trends)… will you be telling them as you declared here – ‘stop all this moaning and groaning. gimme a break’ ??

  32. @Lazy Leo: What I said was in response to Aurina saying a “look over” is fine but not ogling. Like most wanting-to-get-laid-by-feminists people or feminist, you conveniently sidestep what I said. I never said that rape, groping, child molestation is not serious enough. But looking really is not and that is because many times girls invite “looking” themselves (again not rape).

    If you are a guy, I deeply sympathize with your female relatives for having such an idiot in their midst. And if you are a female, nice knowing you mam.

  33. pranav,

    I am a woman and having faced it myself, i can understand exactly what Aurina is saying. A few glances or a non-threatening ‘looking from afar’ is way different from blatant ogling and following. And I have seen it happen to myself and others time and time again irrespective of the clothes we wear. You may think looking is no big deal ….. but how do we know it will stop at just a look? Trust me – the intensity of a stare can be very unnerving, threatening, occasionally downright frightening. Firstly of course it is a violation of personal space. But there’s much more to it. Most of us women have experienced how quickly a stare can turn into a grope or worse.

    Please rid yourself of the idea that only girls in short skirts or plunging necklines get ogled at. In India it can happen to ANY woman irrespective of age, beauty or type of clothing.

    And you have only to travel to western countries to see how girls (who are really wearing those short and tight clothing you mentioned) still do not invite such unwelcome attention. Why is it that the men over there can control their basic instincts better inspite of all the ‘temptation’?

  34. @Lazy Leo: Let me answer that last question. It is because of societal permissiveness that Western men dont appear as so “desperate” and the fact that men are “used to” such displays. When Benazir Bhutto was campaigning, mullahs called her “half-naked” because she showed her face.

    Plus you are very wrong if you think such street harassment does not happen in the West–Italy is famous for it and my wife has been offered rides insistently when she was walking alone, her friends have been asked for telephone numbers. Also in the West there are not so many crowds which somewhat makes the situation better.

  35. Heh, heh! Exchanges over a serious matter like sexual harrassment and whether a blogathon is going to have any effect on it gradually turned into something sorta funny! I can’t believe you guys are actually arguing over whether ogling/staring is okay. Is somebody here trying to tell me that all this time when parents have been trying ot teach their kids not to stare at strangers because it is rude, they were all actually teaching unnecessary lessons??… and hell! That doesn’t even involve any sexual innuendo!! I will be damned! And if glance overs boost female ego then doggoneit!!! I have added a hoard of egotistic women in this world!! Father, I have sinned!!!
    Hey Pranav! Imagine you are late from work… verrrry late. You walk up to the metro station to catch a train home. The next train is 15 min later. There is nobody at the platform, except four obviously gay men standing nearby looking at you. Just looking! And looking…

    P.S. I am so “wela” today! I lost count of how many comments I wrote to various posts today. Somebody, please give me some work to do!!!

  36. @Debasish: How in God’s Good Earth can you say if somebody is “obviously gay” ? Unless……

  37. Anon,
    LOL! I knew somebody will latch on to that!!! Unless what? Unless I am gay?
    Actually, I can’t tell. It is a standing joke between me and a friend of mine who has this theory. He claims he can detect gay people just by looking at them and how they behave. I am yet to figure it out myself. 🙂
    Anyways, without throwing that in I couldn’t have created the situation. If you have a problem with that, let’s imagine that before starting to stare at Pranav, they just look at each other and say “We are gay, okay?” which Pranav overhears and then they turn towards Pranav and start staring. Happy? …. I don’t know! Go do some imagining yourself. Jeez!!

  38. Now I will wait for somebody to comment on the subsequent occurrences of the following two sentences:
    “Unless what? Unless I am gay?
    Actually, I can’t tell.”

  39. My Dear GB,

    First of all many congrats. This is the best post of the Blank Noise Project. No overtures, no drama, just cutting the crap and getting to the point.

    You said to Debashis:

    “Aamazingly brave of you to do that–but people like you are rare. I wonder how many bloggers who are writing everywhere “men should take a stance” are actually going to take it when push comes to shove. Men like you are rare.”

    I wanted to say something to Deabshis but now I wont as you have already said what I wanted to say.

    Again I quote:
    “I wonder how many bloggers who are writing everywhere “men should take a stance” are actually going to take it when push comes to shove.”

    Magnificent. Simply magnificent. Which is why i saw and dismissed rather quickly the links provided by Reena. Actually you have read a very pertinent point. Topics like this can stir up a lot of emotions , Bollywood style. But you are a master of Bollywood, you see through the emotion and see the harsh cold logic.

    You know I had a PT teacher in school who used to rub the asses to the girls but used to give tall speeches on how women were like God. If only writing a post that pleases feminists could wash away the sins that one perpetrates!

    Again, you rose in my esteem with you succint and no-nonsense post. Ill tell you what if I had to write a post on the topic, I would have written just the same words that you have. Thou art great!!

  40. @yourfan2: Thank you

    @All: Rather a spirited discussion here….varry interesstingggg

  41. On an isolated note GB, Id like to ask you a question, what if some girl sues RTDM if she finds the stare of you in your latest pic on this blog as lecherous? :))))

    You never know, you know.

  42. female harrasment on streets is common, in homes is even more common. sexual harrasment takes many forms and has many degrees of severity. it is demeaning and can leave scars on the psyche.
    i have always maintained that women cannot ask for freedom, liberty, or growth, without carrying the other half of the world along. Lopsided change is no change at all, it merely increases disparity. Yes, men need to move along with the women for any change to take palace.
    men have a tendecy to say getting raped? lie back and enjoy it!!!
    Wonder how they would feel if the roles were reversed.?
    writing will go some way in changing attitudes. Hopefuly…

  43. Just to mention since I saw some one mentioning benazir bhutto. I saw this photo on flickr with benazir in a very short skirt. I would say if i saw her like that in real life then i would also ogle at het.

  44. The Supreme Court guidelines and the The Sexual Harassment of Women at the Workplace (Prevention and Redressal) Bill, 2004 (later revised in 2006) have made it explicit that it is mandatory on the part of an employer to ensure an environment free from the threat of any kind of sexual harassment and exploitation.

    The Supreme Court has mandated every organisation to have a committee to address incidents of sexual harassment in the workplace. However, a Committee alone will not solve the issue in its entirety, as its presence does not address the issue from the roots. Organisations need to think of a series of steps to address this phenomenon in its varied dimensions. In this context, having a Policy Against Sexual Harassment will be useful in developing a strategy to deal with sexual harassment in the workplace.

    We can have more policy details of sexual harassment in Pria’s NGO website. Most of the peoples are not aware about sexual harassment and its very important to make them aware this will help us to decrease occurring sexual harassment in our country. By the help of Pria’s (NGO) website we can came to know a lots of things base on sexual harassment. It’s my personal experience that this website helps girls a lot and we can share our views and quarries with others in its forum.

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