How can a minister say that 90 per cent of the saints are not wearing their underwear? How did he know that?
Indeed how did he? Or rather why did he know that? For full context, read this.
Monthly Archive for May, 2008
Page 2 of 3
The standard sequence of events—-
1. Bomb blasts happen in a crowded area of an Indian city X bringing death and destruction in its wake.
2. Startling revelations are made by the administration within a few hours, bringing to light facts no-one could have guessed.
“Obviously, it’s a terrorist plot,” A.S. Gill, the police chief of Rajasthan, said hours after the attack. “The way it has been done, the attempt was to cause the maximum damage to human life.”
God damn those terrorists. Just when we think that they would do things in a way so as to cause the minimum damage to human life, they go ahead and do something totally unexpected.
Oh what drama doth cricket produce.
A meager 133 runs to defend. The most successful opening pair of the tournament at the crease.
And running into bowl is a man rejected by his country as too undisciplined, too over-the-hill and just too wacko to warrant selection, a man out of competitive cricket for months and barely match-fit, written off and lampooned by most (and that includes me).
What happens next?
Magic.
[Photo credits: the Mangalorean]
Welcome to India’s latest reality show—-”Will You Go Tomorrow, Tick Tick Tick Tick” (inspired by the iconic “If you come tomorrow”) presented by the same guys who brought you “Kamzor Kuri Kaun”, “Kaun Banega Laxmipati” and “Jeeto Thappad Marke”. For those of you who haven’t tuned in before, in every show, we kick out, based on popular opinion, one member of the Bangalore Royal Challengers team.
A quick recap. Yesterday the team member who lost his job was Charu Sharma, the CEO of the franchise. Yes the same Charu Sharma who sat to the left of Mandira Bedi in Extraa Innings, the host with a penchant for talking a lot about “nothing at all”, a man whose bald pate sometimes out-glistened in its smoothy roundness the things that Mandira Bedi brought to the table.
Well to be exact Charu Sharma was not really “fired”. According to the official version, Charu Sharma left for personal reasons—-reasons that were so personal even the person himself didn’t know what they were.
And today with yet another embarassing loss to a team also scraping the bottom of the IPL barrel, it is time for the Bengaluru Boys to lose one more item of clothing.
So which one will it be?
“Yeh hain aasli Bhaiyyaji” shouts Anil Kapoor playing the role of don Bhaiyyaji as he rips open his shirt, in the process revealing a plot twist I can honestly say I never saw coming.
The twist in question being that, perhaps in keeping with today’s “chikna” aesthetics, someone had shaven Anil Kapoor’s legendary mane of chest hair (which was, as far as I know, one of the world’s last natural rain forests) exposing in the process Mr. Jhakaas’s mannaries (man-mammaries) and his “One Two Ka Four, Four Two Ka One” packs. [Explicative picture to left]
Which leads me to once again acknowledge the wisdom of that immortal line spoken by Khulbushan Kharbandha in Gupt :
“Kuch baatein gupt raheni chahiye” (Some things are best kept hidden).
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