Wafaa—the Review

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“Ebhabeo phire asha jaaye”—-Chandrabindoo

[ Even like this, one can come back ]

Millions shed tears as Rajesh “the Kaka” Khanna vanished away from the public eye in the 90s, even though once a while like in “Aa Ab Laut Chalen” (Come on let’s go back) he would make a special appearance, giving us a darshan in a wig, a wig that would be, keeping in mind his age, as black as a tear from the eyes of a black hole. Of course these sporadic sightings would only make us pine even more for those glorious days when Rajesh Khanna would just slant his head and nod keeping his eyes shut and luscious lips half-open—a mannerism that would seduce no make that compel women (even some men) to drop their towels with a “Bhool kahein na humse ho jaaye” desire burning in their body.

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Raaz the Mystery Continues—the Review

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Once you think about it, a smelly fart is somewhat like an evil spirit in that it is incorporeal, cannot be seen or photographed, inflicts suffering and is extremely difficult to exorcise. This is why when in “Raaz the Mystery Continues” Nandita the heroine hears sinisterly hoarse devilish voices and unseen-to-everyone-but-herself images of bloody messages being scribbled , messages that say “Tum asuddh Ho. Tum Sar chuke ho” [You are soiled. You are rotting] I kept wondering as to the nature of the “soiling” and speculating on the real mystery behind the twisted faces of the damned and their tortured expressions.

If only the movie had been about an infernal smell that arises from eating too much oily food, “Raaz the Mystery Continunes”, the latest offering from the stables of the Bhatts, would have been mildly original.

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Advertisements We Did Not See

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ICC Announces List of Best Ever Fielders

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Close on the heels of its list of “Best Ever”  Test and  One day International batsmen and bowlers, the International Cricket Council today released the list of the Best fielders of all time and like the previously released rankings, this one is all set to lead, once again, to a reevaluation of what constitutes cricketing excellence.

Releasing the list, ICC representative said that a complicated, proprietary ranking function was used to create this list weighing in factors like “fitness”, “grace”, “enthusiasm” and most importantly “match impact” using the same algorithm that was used to rank batsmen and bowlers.

Needless to say, the list is surprising. Phil Tufnell, famous for fielding displays like this [Video] is at the top of the list. Monty Panesar, dubbed the Second Tufnell, and Sourav Ganguly come in a close second and third.

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Of Ray and Boyle

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[Warning: long post]

“Taare Zamein Par” won’t be bringing the Oscars to India. Not that we uber-nationalists need to worry—“Slumdog Millionaire” will be winning many and “do India proud”. Coming back to TZP, I cannot say that it deserved to be nominated as I have not seen any of the movies that edged it out. However I can say that I thought it was an exceptional bit of work from mainstream commercial Bollywood, not because of the noble “message” or because of the story but because of its immensely cinematic first half where we are provided a beautiful insight into the world of a child, as he skips out of school and wonders on the small wonders of the world like the glories of paint mixing and the other small miracles we adults no longer are moved by.What it was perhaps missing was a bit of Indian exotica or a bit of the old sweat-and-dung-and-heat kind of muskiness that defines the sub-continetal cinematic experience—the Darsheel character’s dyslexia was fine and all but if he only had leprosy along with it, TZP would have been a “celebration of the wonder that is India”. Perhaps.

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And He's Out !

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[No this is not a post on Hayden’s retirement]

It all started when I came to know that Noddy telling Big Ears “Let’s have a gay time in the woods” did not mean that they were going for flowers a-plucking but possibly to do something that simply rhymes with plucking.

Barely had I recovered from that shock then I was told of the subtext in the dynamics of the relationship between my two favorite superheros—dynamic duo Batman and Robin. Suffice to say, there were many activities happening in the darkness of the batcave that Alfred “Penny(s)”worth kept hidden from the world.

Finally it was revealed by wise men that Prince Adam’s transformation from a pink-wearing softie to a muscle-bound confident “He-Man” was a metaphor for “coming out of the closet” and that the secret of Prince Adam, the one that the Sorceress and Man-At-Arms knew, was not the one we were led to assume.

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