If there is anyone in today’s India that would receive more scorn than the pedophile and the baby-murderer, it is he who does not provide the fullest support to Anna Hazare and his Jan Lok Pal campaign. So much as express a smidgen of doubt about the “Second Independence Struggle” and be prepared to be digitally and socially mauled, unfriended, unfollowed, drawn, quartered and subject to death by a thousand cuts. “Congress agent” “Traitor” “Jealous of Anna Hazare’s success” “I cannot believe you are the same person I once respected” and “What have you done for the country? I am bunking work and sending SMS and have you done that?” are just some of the more polite responses you should expect to encounter should you not be a member of “100000 Indians in support of Anna Hazare”. This invective is ironic considering that Team Anna and its supporters, being so zealously possessive of their rights of dissent (and rightfully too), would be expected to give others the right to disagree without making them run the gauntlet.
Archive for the 'Politics' Category
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A few days ago, I read in the news that a lady had been apprehended at the airport for trying to bring in an item considered so detrimental to the health of our nation that it has been banned by the sagacious Government of India.
What was it, you ask? RDX? Drugs? Counterfeit money?
No. No. Those we are fine with.
So then what dangerous item was it that set off the security alarms ?
Sex toys.
The tragedy of terrorist attacks in India is that you can take a blog-post from three years ago, make a small change here and one change there, and it would seem like I just wrote it. Fresh and hot. That’s the thing. Nothing changes. Not a bit. The same bomb blasts, the same canned responses, the same floundering in the dark, the same impotent social media rage, the same sense of headless chicken-ness.
I saw one person splutter angrily on TV ” There was no police here before the blast. No security.”
Security? Hmm.
Well in February I went to Gateway of India. Post 26/11 and to borrow a Shastrism “after the horse has bolted”, there was security there. A lot of it. Limited access. People in wardi. Metal detector. Only bug in the program—–people could walk around the metal-detector, without standing underneath it, and no one around seemed to be mildly concerned at this small fly in the security ointment.
Security? Hmm.
Cast of Characters for the Farce That Is Currently Going On:
1. Baba Ramdev: Babas are great. Baba Sehgal. Baba Zarda. And of course billionaire monk, one man brand, the ever reticent Baba Ramdev. How can one not consider with utmost seriousness a sage who can cure homosexuality, flatulence, cancer and AIDS, through the simple device of strategically rhythmic inhaling and exhaling? How can one not be in awe of his mature Alice in Wonderland Red Queen’s “Off with their heads” solution to the country’s endemic problems (He advocates death penalty to the corrupt)? How can one not be blown away by the sagacity of his solutions—like how he advocates doing away with Income Tax and replacing it with a mere 1-2% transaction tax (yes that’s what he says—take that Tea Party, take that Fair Tax and take that Michele Bachman )? How can one not admire how he has used his Yoga platform to leapfrog onto the political stage? How can one not appreciate his steadfast resolve to bring back all the black money, stowed in cash havens abroad. It’s a simple thing really, just make all the banks in Switzerland, Lichenstein and Monaco watch Aastha channel and they will hand over their lists while doing anulom and veelom. I mean the Americans and Germans can get the banks to bend to their will…why cannot India, an equally powerful nation in the firmament of nations.
What I love most about Baba is his simplicity. Simple saffron vastram. Simple chartered plane. Simple solutions. Breathe in. Kill the corrupt. Bring their wealth back. Abolish income tax. Gays are sick people. Breathe out. Repeat five times. And then the other nostril.
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