The Death of Imran Kissme

100 Comments

Many many years hence…

Spontaneous displays of grief were witnessed out all over the city as the death of Imran Kissme, the doyen of Hindi movies, was announced on TV India. At 12:00 midnight, Dr. Rekha Sexena (who this correspondent has gathered has been having a hot affair with her gardener for a year now), chief medical officer at the private hospital he had been admitted to for lip-reconstruction surgery, announced to the assembled press that Mr Kissme passed away peacefully in his sleep of causes unknown.

As soon as the news of his death spread, mobs of heartbroken fans swarmed the streets—wailing in high-pitched nasal Reshmmaic tones, crying out “Woh Lamhe”, setting buses ablaze, vandalizing public property and looting shops—actions which led to the RAF being deployed at many places.

“He took Kissme away from us”–weeped a disconsolate fan, pointing to the sky. Then he pointed to an electronics gadget store, whose doors had been ripped away from its sockets, and said “And He shall pay” as he proceeded to carry away a wide-screen holgraphic device.

The correspondent caught up with another group of students, who were throwing stones and debris at the offices of Microsoft Research, one of the world’s oldest companies. When this correspondent asked why they were trying to vandalize Microsoft, one of the leaders, his eyes red with anger and tears said:

“We owe everything to Imran-ji. Countless generations of young men have used the Kissme Gambit to get girls to take off their top (reference: ” Aashiq Banana Aap Ke” where he gets the heroine to take off her upper garment in order to show that she trusts him)—and now he is no more. He made “adultery” a household word—in addition to “adulteration” which had always been part of our lexicon. The world as we know is over.”

Of course the connection between that and throwing stones at Microsoft Research was not made. But then again logical consistency was never the strong point of Kissme’s work.

The chief minister was quick to absolve all fans of Imran Kissme of guilt. According to him, the violence was instigated by “special interests” and though he knew who it was, he was not telling.

Elsewhere statues of the other doyen of Indian movies: Dino Moronia were attacked by irate fans. Just like Karunanidhi’s statues were after MGR’s death many eons ago.

Reacting to Kissme’s death, Bhatt Patel (the love-child of Mukesh Bhatt and Amisha Patel), whose father Mukesh Bhatt made a record number of movies with Kissme kept looking at the camera, cross eyed with a blank expression on his face–all the while struggling to speak. Ultimately he could only flutter his eyelids.

In late breaking news, curfew has been clamped in anticipation of greater violence as news filtered out that Dave Anand, currently housed at the Museum of Natural History, is planning to do a biopic based on Imran Kissme’s life (called Kiss the Girls) with Dave-ji himself essaying the role of the superstar.

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100 thoughts on “The Death of Imran Kissme

  1. amazing, mindblowing…. i’ve been following your blog for long but this one takes the cake. probably because it deals with the evnets which happened just a few kms from me. great job

  2. YOURFAN writes:
    @All: Belated shubho Nabobarso
    @GB: Belated shubho Nabobarso to you, your wife , your parents and your parents in laws. Hilarious. But on a serious note: Why do people – specially the media only talk about Bengalese’ ‘strong’ reaction to say Saurav issue to be highly emotional? At least it is a live issue about which we get emotional. And we definitely don’t shut down the whole city. But in some other part of the country, people get emotional to the extent that they damage public property, shut down the whole city over an old idol’s NATURAL death. Talk about double standard!!

  3. @ Arnab :

    LOL !!!

    I don’t really to what extent your story of “Imran Kissme” will come true, but being at Bangalore, I can very well imagine what it could be like after the “Passing away of Rajkumar” fiasco.
    With due respect to Rajkumar the superman and the sentiments of the Kannadigas, I feel the public outrage was not only ucalled for, it was pointless, needless and extremely foolish.

    It is well understood and accepted that Rajkumar was not just a filmstar here, he was one of those very few people who played significant roles for the well-being , recognition and progress of Bangalore, Karnataka, Kannadigas and also the Kannada language. He was to Karnataka what George W. Bush is to Tony Blair.

    How is a normal human being supposed to behave when he/she loses a near and dear one forever? He can cry, he can scream, he can curse GOD, he can faint etc etc. But is he ever going to beat up others who have nothing to do with it, throw stones at them, break window-glasses in buidings, set buses and cars afire? Well… this is what happened here for a couple of days killing at least 8 people (that’s the official record) and seriously injuring about 250 (officially again).

    Shops were forcefully closed down. Shop-owners were beaten if they didn’t pull down the shutters fully. Cars , bikes and other vehicles were put on fire and drivers/riders beaten up brutally if they didn’t have photos of Rajkumar with a garland pasted at the front and rear of the vehicle. In fear, almost every company (including mine) gave each of its employees two print-outs of Rajkumar’s photo to paste in the front and rear of their vehicles.

    Buildings, shops, vehicles, roads were damaged. In many parts of the city there were needless instances of violence.

    I really wonder if these rowdies were really fans of the great man. They were creating trouble for everyone else only for the fucking sake of it. Only they know what pleasure they were deriving from it.

    Although Bangalore Police is one the most (if not the most) corrupt and irritatingly discriminative species on earth, the mischief-makers shouldn’t have beaten up the Policemen. I understand that they didn’t want to waste this opportunity to hurl stones at or beat the guts out of the damn Bangalore cops, but still, they have only put themselves in trouble because the electronic media has covered the whole incident of cops being beaten by some people. Although everybody watching that on TV has enjoyed it and relished every bit of it, the guys who did so are being searched for by the cops with their photos obtained from the videotapes. You can’t do anything to the cops although they can do anything to you anywhere anytime and without any reason. OOOPS…..did I say ‘cops’? Sorry….’Bangalore Cops’ that is…..

    Anyways, Arnab, wonderful post …. great imagination. 🙂

  4. Arnab,
    While taking a good shot at these illogical morons, you do forget that Film stars are never going to get that amount of fanaticism in the North. It is a uniquely Southie phenomenon – I would say the one blot that pulls down the otherwise decent cultured Southie social scape. I am sure even Shahrukh Khan wouldnt give rise to such vandalism in death in the Hindi Heartland. That a 80-year old past superstar could speaks ill of the Kannadiga and Tamil society, especially. I am including tamil society because they are well capable of similar acts. Just wait and watch when Karunanidhi/Ramadoss/Rajinikanth etc buy their ticket to heaven. On the filp side, one must mention that when Sivaji Ganesan died, there was a phenomenal outpouring of grief and a record crowd collected for the funeral etc but such acts didnt occur. But he was only a super actor, not a superstar in the Rajkumar sense.
    The question is why Superstars evoke this sort of response in the south. Is it some sort of prestige issue? (Like, when MGR died, 50 shops were vandalised in Chennai – we should do better than that”!)

  5. Hi Greatbong ,
    I am a regular reader of your blog but never commented though.
    Really a nice post…
    One thing you are wrong at, in this post…..
    Amisha’s Boyfriend is Vikram Bhatt and not Mukesh Bhatt………correct me if I am wrong…

    —————
    Badshah

  6. I was never a fan of Raj Kumar the actor. But I admired Raj Kumar the human being. He was a simpleton. Always humble. He never desired political power -Although he could have been a CM ala MGR/NTR-. No one saw ever him angry. After spending 100 odd days as a hostage he did not say a single rude thing about Veerappan. Truly, a remarkable human being. The rioting and violence goes against everything he’s stood for.

    The saddest part is that Raj Kumar could not even get a proper burial. The crowd stormed the burial grounds and threw rocks at his family!! His son had to return in the middle of the night to perform last rituals.

    About Imaran hashmi, the first time I saw Murder I wanted to call Indian air force and say “Is this the IAF? Good. I want to request an air strike at X theatre. The coordinates are…”

  7. Nahiiiiiiin!!!! when did this unfortunate incident happen?? how did this happen??? Did KISSME die of SUFFOCATION..He must have been practising some new moves..I still cant believe this..Gen X has lost an icon, a mentor, a teacher who believed in teaching by doing it himself…

    gr8 post Sir…as usual rotfl

    Cheers!!

  8. Well amazing piece,
    But what happened in bangalore after Mr. rajkumars death was really shocking. At palace ground (an open place for organising various events in bangalore) electronic fare was going on. Those people who use to day that tehy are in grief looted the place, misbehaved (actually it was much worse than rape) with ladies present there. And the great thing was bangalore cops or we can say Mr. chief minister. The cops shoot only when it came to the security of the ministers at funeral place. Else nowhere police was trying too much of things.
    Who is going to pay for this huge billion rupees loss?
    At last but not least, what ever the good work Rajkumar did in his lifetime, the bloody kannadigans (banglaorians) ruined it. Almost all people, teh shop-keepers, daily wagers, persons who have to do extratime due to this riot, people who missed their train, flight and all who ever affected abused rajkumar and the kannadigans.

    This was the homage paid by the people of bangalore(who tell themselves as true banglorians) to that great actor.

    Great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. This is hilarious!!!

    When I went to Chennai for two months, my friend living there had warned me not to utter a word against Rajnikanth or Karunanidhi or ‘Amma’ in public. “You’ll probably be lynched”, she said. That’s why before coming to Hyderabad I made sure whether I could talk about Azhar in public.

    And still they will say that Kolkata has a culture of bandhs and violent protests, and IT companies should flock to the South!

  10. Very funny post! Though, I find it unfortunate, that it concerns incidents that we Bangaloreans are so ashamed of.

    It is very difficult to explain what happened, and why. More than an actor, he was respected as a good human being. But still this behaviour is not justified. Everybody asks me why all the fuss about the “natural death” of an “aged actor”. Well, I don’t know.

    But I do know one thing. Those who created all the trouble were no fans of his. If you see the video footage, these people did a bit of stone-throwing, and then grinned and posed in front of the camera. These were just drunken rowdies and good-for-nothings who were out to have what they call a good time. The real fans were at home, silently mourning.

    I want to ask people like Anand to refrain from using phrases like “Bloody Kannadigans” – [it is Kannadigas, not Kanndigans, and it is Bangalore, not Banglaor, get your spellings right].

    Please do not generalize. The rioters were a fraction of the society, and there are a million Kannadigas and Bangaloreans out here, like me, who are disgusted and distressed with the behaviour of these few.

  11. I was strictly asked to stay away from the main roads as I left home early that day and if attacked by a mob I was supposed to chant “Rajkumar ki jai”.I was wondering the next day while watching the media coverage whether muttering that much was sufficient.What if they had asked me utter some dialogues from one of his superhit movie or sing the song he got the National award for in lieu of my life?? 😛
    I had never imagined in my life that I would be getting frantic calls from my parents enquiring about my safety because of a film star’s death!

    As usual a very well written post!

  12. @ Shruthi :

    Can’t agree more with you when you say “The rioters were a fraction of the society”. But unfortunately, they constitute a major portion of the society. Therefore, if anyone (Anand, for example) generalizes these people as Kannadigas, he/she can’t really be blamed….especially considering the way they behave with most of us “Naarth Indiyaans” every now and then. Of course, I’m not talking about every Kannadiga but most of them. I know, there are sane Kannadigas as well but very few in numbers compared to the insane ones. The well-educated, elite Kannadigas are really really very nice people but the low-class ones, especially people falling in the middle and lower middle class like landlords, cops, autorickshaw-drivers, cab drivers etc who constitute most of the Knnadiga population are ill-mannered, regionally biased, hostile towards us (the ‘outsiders‘) and get sadistic pleasure in giving us trouble in as many ways as possible.
    They somehow have this feeling that we the “Naarth Indiyaans” have come here to earn more than average locals deprieving their children.

    The ”made-out-to-be-much-more-chaotic-than-what-it-actually-should-have-been” Rajkumar fiasco has just added some fuel to the alredy existing anger and grievances that many people like Anand have towards Kannadigas in general.

  13. I can never forget the day after Dr Rajkumar’s death when Bangalore wore a look straight out of hollywood doomsday movies when people abandon cities. Probably guys who lead their pitiful solitary bachelor lives suffered the most because there was no food available. Also I had never taken the premise of having food backups seriously and it was a perfect situaton that could generate palpitations in my Mom’s heart to hear her son was not being fed wholesome food(somehow this is the first query I am asked whenever I call home).
    While I was not able to relate to this unique outpouring of grief induced viloence, I realised one important thing that hunger can make one do things one would not do otherwise 😉 . We had to go to a hospital canteen to get something to eat and we maintained a pained countenance lest our intentions be misinterpreted that day (which was not difficult considering we had been hungry for quite sometime).
    The cable operators were showing only news channels and local channels which were playing Rajkumar movies so that people wouldn’t be tempted not to partake in the misfortune that had befallen the fans.
    I dread the day when Rajnikant says his final goodbye……. I have started hoarding Maggi ofcourse.

  14. @ Cipher :
    I would have faced a similar situation had I not stocked food-stuff up on the previous evening. 🙂
    Not that I knew that something of this sort was gonna happen but it was just that this month I got a little late in picking up my monthly groceries ,vegetables and of course maggi 😉 from food-bazaar (the delay however proved to be worth it). It actually didn’t let me and a few of my bachelor friends starve.
    But, yes, there were many people who had to starve through these couple of days. Not only bachelors, but also people staying with families had to face it as it happened just before the weekend and on a working day as usually people go to the market and grocer’s in the weekend.

  15. Hi Debolin – I am particularly sorry to see that you feel that Kannadigas are ill-mannered, regionally biased, hostile, etc, because the very reason that Bangalore attracted hordes of people in the first place, was because of the weather, and the very hospitable local population.

    I am not saying this out of false pride or anything, it is a proven fact. The scenario might have changed now, I am not denying it, but one of the reasons for this change is the attitude that “outsiders” [I would not call them that, anyway) have towards the “localites”.

    Anyway, I do not want to take up too much comment space, and go off in a tangent. This is a funny post, let the comments remain that way too. But before that, let me clarify once again, that the rioters were just a small fraction of the Kannada speaking populace. Tell me, if all Kannadigas were fanatics and maniacs and whatever, why is it that the rest of Karnataka was peaceful? The fact that it happened in Bangalore smacks of much deeper issues. Let’s leave it at that.

  16. Hi Shruthi,
    I didn’t say “Kannadigas are ill-mannered, regionally biased, hostile, etc” in my reply.

    Instead, I had said that The well-educated, elite Kannadigas are really really very nice people. I had added that the low-class ones, especially people falling in the middle and lower middle class like landlords, cops, autorickshaw-drivers, cab drivers etc who constitute most of the Knnadiga population are ill-mannered, regionally biased, hostile towards us (the ‘outsiders‘) and get sadistic pleasure in giving us trouble in as many ways as possible.

    I had also written ” I know, there are sane Kannadigas as well but very few in numbers compared to the insane ones.”

    I fully agree with you when you say the very reason that Bangalore attracted hordes of people in the first place, was because of the weather, and the very hospitable local population. But yes, the scenario has really changed now, in the last 5-6 years or so, after more and more people have started pouring in from the northern parts of the country because of the booming IT-sector. This somehow has created a feeling of insecurity among the middle and lower middle class over here. We work here, we earn our breads here and now this is our home-town (at least I personally feel so) and still even sfter staying here for so long we are labelled as “Naarth Indiyaans”almost everywhere.

    I’m not generalizing but considering what people who have come here from outside like me have to face most of the times, if someone generalizes also, he can’t really be blamed.

  17. I have ‘Insider news’.. or rather i know a person who has. Apparently a few goons, say a hundred, were hired by an ex-minister, who was sorely disappointed with the current administration for some arbit reason, and asked to break loose all hell with the pretext of being emotionally unstable fans of ‘annavaru’. I know this can be dismissed as another regular conspiracy theory but somehow I find it quite convincing.

  18. @dEbOLiN

    Very sad that u r stereotyping kannadigas so.. ask a ‘southie’ who has been to delhi or punjab and the treatment he recieves. Its even worse. Unfortunately the north south divide is mutual and too deep to be ignored. No one likes it.. but its there to stay

  19. @ anon at 12:14 pm:

    I also find it very sad that you too think I was stereotyping the Kannadigas. I was pointing towards a large section of them, not all of them. Please go through my replies to Shruthi’s comments minutely.

  20. According to him, the violence was instigated by “special interests” and though he knew who it was, he was not telling.

    LOL……must be those pesky CIA agents…or the ISI.

  21. @dEbOLiN

    You claim that you are not stereotyping and YET you refer to a ‘large section’ of them… thats highly oxymoronic. If you mean ‘a few people’, thats acceptable. ‘Large section’ not doing any good to your argument. It obviously implies ‘most of them’.

  22. Too much !
    esp first para.with the trivia abt the CMO.
    Dave anand ? good lord !
    thank God u ‘ve explained abt the Bhat child but even i think its Vikram not Mukesh Bhatt.
    have stopped questioning u ,bcos if u say the AAshik banaya sequence must b real!

  23. Real funny post… OTOH I find it very difficult to understand how people can be so influenced by a film star. The aftermath was ridiculous.

  24. @Debo, Shruthi, anon
    The reason Arnab wrote this post is more important and thought provoking! Instead you folks are diverting into some petty minded regionalism. When will we learn from history and stand united as Indians?
    Debo, would you think all kannadigas are bad when a street hawker calls you ‘naarth indiyaans’. Well then look at how ‘naarth indiyaans’ mock south Indians in any hindi film humour. No wonder they call Bihar, UP as ‘gunda’ states. We make fun of punjabis through ‘sardar’ jokes. We laugh at bengalis as ‘communists’. You see, we Indians are experts in pulling legs of our own countrymen.
    So, you don’t have right to generalize people from any state and especially try to avoid the viciousness in your tone.

  25. @dEbOLiN,
    Its interesting that you say that you are not generalising and yet you point out to a large section of the crowd.

    And the trouble that I have with your comment is that you should have used Bangaloreans( and not Kannadigas) or whatever they are called when you were referring to the hooligans. Bangalore has a large population of Tamils and Telugus in the city and they not only constitute the IT sector but the other classes too.
    As whenever there are riots or trouble in Mumbai, it is unfair to say Maharashtrians went on the rampage coz they frankly constitute a miniscule portion of the city, similar is the case for Bangalore.

    @yourfan,
    Double Standards!! Well, the saner elements have spoken against the whole thing. And not many groups have come forward to justify the act. And just to show that the whole thing was just downright ugly, you can see that none of the groups in Bangalore are ready to take a responsibilty for the actions.

    What happened in Bangalore was a mob violence of the lowest order and it should be condemned by one and all. And that is what Arnab has rightly done.

    And Raj was right when he mentioned such hero worship of the movie stars being carried out exclusively in south. Frankly, dont know the reason about this. If someone here can enlighten us about this, then that would be great.

    Cheers,
    HP

  26. Also, lest my above comment be constructed as supporting the violence, I would categorically like to state that it is not. The violence that followed the hero’s death was just sickening. And to see people destroying property and inciting riot like situation without any provocation was totally revolting, to say the least.

    Why do people behave in such an insane manner at such a natural thing as death is incomprehensible to a person like me. And it was really sad to see that his family was not left alone in their moment of grief.

    And hopefully, the governments in the south have learnt their lessons and would be better prepared for such idiotic situations. Yes, it would be difficult to predict such violence. We might now know what people will kill for tomorrow. But, it definitely grates on you to see such events occurring when all are talking about building a better India.

    God Save Us!!

    HP

  27. ROFL! This was awesome buddy – the parallels are superlative!

    “…Imran Kissme’s life (called Kiss the Girls) with Dave-ji himself essaying the role of the superstar.” – Absolute Killer – hehe! I can’t wait for his movie on “Annaavaru Raj Kumar” hehehe…

    Suyog

  28. YOURFAN writes:
    @Yourfan2: I am sorry that you have to take the flak meant for me.

    @Rahul: I, Yourfan made that comment not Yourfan2. First please have your facts right before you accuse someone. Secondly, why shouldn’t I start on ‘that’ topic – it is relevant to this post. Joy Forever also shares my view when he writes “And still they will say that Kolkata has a culture of bandhs and violent protests, and IT companies should flock to the South!” Also read Shruthi’s comment – you will understand why I started on ‘that’ topic.

    @Shruthi: I understand your anguish of being branded as “something” just because a portion of the population (I am not going into the percentage bit) behaves in an atrocious manner. This is my point too. Just because a portion of the population (by the way, which comprises of so many different communities) behaves badly in the Eden Gardens does not mean that all “Bengalis” are irrationally emotional or unpatriotic. Since you are a regular reader of this blog, you must be aware of some of the readers’ derogatory comments about Bengalis and that is what makes me write this comment.

  29. Thats was funny :). Another correspondent traced back the career of the superstar and noted that his initial lukewarm reception on the industry changed to megastardom overnight only after he changed the letters in his name from Imram HasMe to Imran KissMe. Its all in the name after all.

  30. hats off.. gb

    u never fail to deliver…

    the voilence in karnatak was totally uncalled for …
    dunno why but i got a feeling that these events might endup as a plot for a bollywood fillum:D

  31. Pingback: கில்லி - Gilli» Blog Archive » The Death of Imran Kissme - Arnab

  32. My two cents:

    There are deep undercurrents of jealosy, sometimes morphing into sheer hostility within the”indigenous” Bangloreans. The “outlander” techies taking over *their* city, living a lifestyle and earning big bucks, things most locals can’t even dream of are creating the malevolent green-eyed monster in almost every middle class, sub-middle class locals. Anarchism and the high-faluting fundaes of Marxism at the most basic level cashes into the rage, discontent…. and most importantly, the jealousy of the subalterns. Banglore is perhaps the only city other than Mumbai which has seen ethnicity based riots in the past (but much lesser than the N. Karnataka riots against Marathis)….. jingoism runs pretty deep there. This is perhaps the reason why we do’t see similar reactions in Hyderabad, Gurgaon, Trivandrum etc …. YET.

    Rajkumar, as many observed, is a veritable embodiment of the Kannada spirit, a man loved and almost deified by the Kannadigas for his socio-political crusades (including the language issue, immigrant issue) and spotless personal life. The death of that icon, one who always stood for the common Kannadiga must have probably set off the mob violence at some levels…… “HOW DARE THESE OUTLANDERS MAKE MONEY AND DRINK IN PUBS AND BURN CASH WHILE ANNAVURU IS DEAD?!”. The pattern of attack (at the MNCs etc), the depth and scope of the riots (Banglore city was pretty much off the whole fr1ggin grid for a cpl of days!) does show a lash-out against the interlopers. On the other hand, the attacks on the shops/vehicles of locals probably point to a perception of “traitors” not mourning the passing of the great leader. Violence was pretty random (The Destructors type violence) in some places….. including Rajkumar’s funeral! Political elements who cash into the jealousy and rage factor also have utilised this to maximum mileage and to make their political statement. Heck, would rest of India have “noticed” if the axis of Indian IT/Tech juggernaut was not jammed by force.

    The folks who rule India have not missed the signals of jealousy and discontent….. The 2004 election results, the mid term appraisal of the 10th plan, the new generation reforms post ’99, the deluge of programs like Bharat Nirman, NREG etc and even the recent proposed reservation of OBC/SC/STs are means to open the doors to the gravy train that is private enterprise (Govt jobs which used to be the prime mover of Indian economy ain’t that high-paying, so the age old reservations in that sector ain’t enough anymore), are telling pointers to this realisation. In a place like India, non-inclusion of large sections of society, locals and historically downtrodden people in a “Hobbesian” March of the Nation might be a recipe for social tensions. I guess we have to forego a bit of efficency, optimisation and pure meritocracy to avoid it.. IMO, this would drag us down a bit…… but not cripplingly so. No pain without gain, eh?

    PS: Sorree for the long rant BTW.

  33. @Arnab,
    One of the funniest post I have ever read. Sarcastic humor at its best. Great work there.

    @Anand (The Wanderer),
    1)From what I gathered in my two years stay in Bangalore saying “The “outlander” techies taking over *their* city, living a lifestyle and earning big bucks, things most locals can’t even dream of are creating the malevolent green-eyed monster in almost every middle class, sub-middle class locals.” would be off the mark. Everyone has been reaping the benefits of IT industry and MNCs over there (indirectly in many cases). I have not seen anger against “outsider” earning huge money.

    2) Agree to your second point that “jingoism runs pretty deep there” which I think is a major cause of what happened. Just tell “Kannada Barailla” (donno Kannada) and your social standing takes a huge downfall.

    3) Well don’t want to start another pointless argument regarding ‘reservation’. But doesn’t that sound like ransom ‘Give high paying jobs to us or else…’. Also forgoing meritocracy would mean joblessness for more deserving candidates. It is like sacrificing innocents for the benefit of the undeserving.

  34. Right: I would never have gone into regional topics here, had Anand not used the phrase, “Bloody Kannadigas”. That was uncalled for, and naturally I felt the urge to defend Kannadigas.

  35. Interesting post and even more interesting comments on it, I must say.
    I could relate to most of the stuff as an outsider, living in the city (Bangalore) for quite some time now.
    Nothing much left to be said now, but just some things I would mention –
    Debolin’s initial comment, well, it not only generalizes (and insults, to be frank) kannadigas (well, not ALL – most of them, like he claims) but also gives off the sense of discrimination by “class”.. What is it with “high class” kannadigas being very very nice and “low class” ones being nasty..?? I am an ‘outsider’ so to say and I m Maharashtrian. Neither ‘southie’ nor ‘northie’. But I d call this a ‘typical north Indian’ remark (yes , now I am generalizing.. but still..) I come from this city Pune which is hailed as the Oxford of the east. Tons of Northies come there for acquiring various degrees n all. i ve observed them all around. They always have this air of superiority for god only knows wht reason. they ll make fun of the local – “low class” – ppl , behave as if they own this place , show off with their (or rather their dad’s) money and in general blame the other person for not knowing Hindi if there s some communication gap. And this behavior is also observed all over the country.
    I agree it is not right to “pull legs of fellow Indians” on the basis of regions but it s not gonna go away like tht..
    The only point I wanna make here is , both , a northie in south India and a southie in north India suffer equally. There s no need be sour n play the blame game. It s the part of the deal. gotta get on with it.
    The point made tht “ingenious” ppl feel insecure due to outsider pouring in to the city with alarming rate is true. And I think it is kinda justified. Won’t you be insecure if this happens to your city? I ve seen what has become of Mumbai. I know how it feels to see hardly any Marathies in the capital of Maharashtra. I don’t blame the Bangalorians.

  36. @ Ranjan:
    I believe *most* benefits reaped by the “hoi polloi” are *trickle down* benefits….. as opposed to *direct* or even *spin-off* benefits (like what happened in Gurgaon/Noida/Mumbai etc). For example, I am told the ownership of the pubs, cafes, bistros, multiplexes, malls and high-end markets/stores, MNC outlets etc where the “outlanders” haunt (and spend a good deal of their money) are not owned by Kannadigas. The major sources of income for the local element are from real estate(a one time deal, where a good deal of shortchanging has occured IMO) and the blue collar workforce like security, drivers, peons etc. The volume of money seeping into the local segments is therefore low compared to what’s being earned and spent, right? People are bound to notice these things…….
    A friend of mine who’s into the sociology urban development architecture realm tells me the megapolis must grow organically, the local elements (like people) must ideally act as the primary feeder and not be “shut out” from the dynamics….. expansion must not take place for expansions sake….. the growth must be sustainable and should be able to take in increasing loads. (Bombay and Delhi have achieved this to a good extent, I guess Bombay would be a better analogy as Delhi’s case is rather recent. In Bombay one can bserve how the local element is linked to he whole socio-economic-political picture, the local being an axis around which the Mumbai Juggernaut rolls. Even there, look what happened when other sections began to take over certain sources of income….. like Mallus once did in auto repair units and medical field. The Shiv Sena itself began in Hotel Oberoi’s workers union units when it seemed “Southies” were taking over *their* jobs IIRC.)

    In Banglore’s case, the industrial units were mostly setup away from the main city…….. BUT (till very recently) the nightlife, hotels, shopping centres were smack right in the urban centres. The good life of the outlander is in full view of the average local, without much to show for themselves on the other hand! You always had industries and important sources of income in B’lore…. HAL, BEL, CDOT, Govt officials, Kollywood etc but the employee demographics, culture shock, money flow and spending pattern was nothing like this! Acquisition of land was at almost criminally low rates (unlike Gurgaon, Chawri Bazaar, Tvm technopark and Hi-Tech City IIRC)…… one major charge levelled at Murthy by Gowda’s ilk. Hence even initial monetary benefits weren’t high for the locals! This was partly because of the poor politicalisation of the concerned sections, political skullduggery, lower political visibility of pioneering B’lore till the IT boom. The farmers in Gurgaon weren’t that easy to dispose, given the number of political outfits at the beck and call of Jat peasantry. Moreover, till recently, except for infrastructure that *directly* benefits the industries (like power and roads), the outlanders “haven’t done anything for local development! They are BOUND to, ‘coz they are in OUR part of the world!”. One can’t expect the private institutions to be too socially commited, but the aam janatha spoonfed and pampered by years of “mai baap” Govt largeese and loan melas and all that jazz, won’t settle for anything les than this sort of “blackmail”. This charge, I believe is a major pet peeve of the locals. Things might have been different if projects like the airport, a mass transport system etc were created with direct grants/investment from the “outlanders”….. but again, these are low return and very long term projects which only a few specialised private parties would take up. Not exactly Infosys’s cup of tea, right?
    ————————————————–

    Reservation issue: Agreed this ain’t the place to discuss that very contentious issue, but Meritocracy had never been India’s civic. Our civic was and is assosciated with social status based on birth. The effects of this 3000 year old policyis all too apparent to us….. we see it everyday of our lives. We can’t wish the issue away, even if it is dragging us down. One has to work around it, make compromises and move to new social regimes. But it’s my belief that in the long run, this “weasling in” the historically downtrodden sections (though rather underperfoming on the whole, in the initial stages/generations) which form 70% of our population into the gravy train and the real mainstream will only benefit us.
    Again, it IS ransom and blackmail…. but then,it ain’t a perfect world. Democracy, i.e the numbers game, is the “worst” form of Govt, except that ALL other systems have fared MUCH MUCH worse! Howz that for a paradox? 🙂

  37. @ Yourfan2 : My heartfelt apologies… I was always bad with numbers 🙂

    @ Yourfan : I am sorry I accused the wrong person initially….
    U claim to be a fan of Arnab and his blog… so I expected at least you to realize what spirit this post was written in (arnab??). And u feel that its relevant to this post???? how pray???
    Y do u feel that you have to justify or defend Bengal in a post about Bangalore???? Also you seem to think that the media is condoning the violence. And Shruti was just responding…RESPONDING to anand’s immature comments so….

  38. Dont want to get into too much detail of the regionalism issue, but would like to note that I do think the so-called ‘North Indians’ have an air of superiority about them, wherever they are in the country(again, exceptions are always there). And I think one of the contributing factors is Hindi as the national language.

    Anyways, I am an Indian first and will always be!!

  39. @ Shruthi, Right, Percy, Hariprasad Poojary and anon :

    You are right. I should have used the term ‘Bangalorean Kannadigas’ instead of using ‘Kannadigas’ . My apologies.

    Now a few more clarifications :

    You might be feeling whatever I have written about Kannadigas was inappropriate. But, to be extremely honest, whatever I tried to express had come straight from my heart. This is what I feel. Even after spending years in this city, falling in love with it and actually planning to make this my home-town, more often than not I am reminded that I am nothing but an outsider here.
    Starting from the first autorickshaw-driver I met when I first landed in Bangalore to hundreds others of them, to quite a few shopkeepers, to the four landlords I’ve so far come across, even to the Police – I’ve seen nothing but contempt, jealousy and hostility for ‘Naarth Indiyaans’ in them. Not only me, there are many who have seen and felt the same. But, unfortunately, being people of typically Indian escapist mentality, in an open forum like this not many of them will voice their honest opinions and instead will try to be as politically correct as possible so that no one gets offended and argues with them.

    I don’t really know how many among you five are Kannadigas but for those who are, let me tell you, you’ll never realize what an average north-Indian person (especially an IT-guy who can’t speak Kannada) has to face in his day-to-day life in Bangalore unless you try walking in one’s shoes once.

    Laughing at or making fun of people (like Right had pointed out) of a certain community is one thing. Looting, harassing and abusing ‘outsiders’ is another. If the former can be termed as ‘regionalism’, then what is the latter? ‘Hooliganistic regionalism?’.

    Sardar, Bong, Mallu jokes are gonna stay forever. No one really gets offended if the spirit is right and no personal/racial attack is there.

    ‘Naarth Indiyaans’ in Bangalore are also gonna come in , work , earn and stay forever. Why can’t a large section of the local population accept and digest this fact?

    I can give you accounts of numerous incidents which have made me (and many others) feel this way but I don’t want to make this comment any longer.

    For knowing about some of my experiences, you can visit these links ….

    LINK # 1

    LINK # 2

    LINK # 3

    ….but let me tell you there are many many more I didn’t write about because if I start writing about all such incidents, I won’t have time to do anything else…..there are so many such horrendous experiences.

  40. LOL!!

    Sigh! Wrong time to not be in B’lore. Cant take my share of holidays or that of loot for that matter.

    Loved the Microsofty bit.

  41. i strongly disagree with debolin and anand. it is not fair to abuse kannadigas and worse still to call them ill mannered… let me enlighten u that bangalore has less of local people and the % of low class and middle class in bangalore are more of tamilians and other regional folks. i think the attitude of the Northies needs to change especially when it comes to integrating with the south and its culture.
    Bangalore and Karnataka has always been a very pleasant place for all and that is exactly why all the northies are flooding here. i think one must stay in chennai for few months to really appreciate the weather, local people of bangalore.
    i am a true bangalorean and a kanndiga and it really pains to read few comments which is not correct.
    i just want to make a point to all that, pls let us not abuse any language/religion…we are talking abt riots in the city and i feel that we are creating a regional/language riot on the internet now. Pls let us enjoi the blog and leave it at that.

  42. Debolin, forget it. “Bangalorean Kannadigas” is also wrong. :). I am a Bangalorean Kannadiga, and I did not go around throwing stones. My maid’s husband’s friend is a Bangalorean non-Kannadiga, and he threw stones. Anyway forget it.

    I know that many North Indians face discrimination, but I know hordes of my North Indian friends who do not face any such problems. Do you know why? Because they say, “SORRY, I am new, I don’t know Kannada, can you PLEASE do –whatever–? THANK YOU”.
    It works.

    Greatbong, my apologies in hogging too much comment space on a seemingly unrelated matter. Each time I decide not to bother any longer, but some comment or the other compels me to have my say once again.

  43. Debolin etc, the issue here is assimilation. When you go to Rome, speak Italian. You will be get , more often than not, special favours.
    Southies have emigrated to the North, West etc for ages now and you wont find them complaining about locals, largely. They assimilate.
    I dont know about your particular case but in general, the problem with some northies in South is that they expect that “Hey Hindi is the National Languageg, how the f*ck you dont know it?” attitude.

    Until you guys understand that Hindi is just another regional language, albeit a larger region, and to expect an auto driver in Chennai to learn Hindi just because your royal highness Mr North India visits there once in a while is silly. Firstly, an auto driver in Chennai doesnt speak proper tamil. To expect him to know Hindi is naive 🙂

    Secondly, North Indians should stop equating “lack of knowledge in Hindi” with “lack of patriotism”.
    This will go a long way in promoting North-South Harmony.

  44. @YOURFAN: Thanks for standing by me.

    @Rahul & others: Surely this blog post is about the riots in Bangalore and not a comparison between Bangalore and Kolkata. However, a comparison automatically comes into mind as I am an IT professional currently working in South India (Thank God Hyderabad is not like that!). South India and particularly Bangalore has always been projected as the problem-free city, especially for IT companies (atleast until recently). And I had to face a lot of ridicule from my south Indian college friends who left the south to go to study in Kolkata, yet always said that Kolkata was the worst city in India, particularly for those reasons (i.e. protests and bandhs). So after coming here and having a first hand look at the real thing, I can’t help making the comparison.
    And those who feel that a Southerner in the North and a Northerner in the South face a similar predicament, they are not entirely correct either. You find south Indian food in most restaurants across India. How many (small) restaurants serve North Indian food in Chennai? Things are more difficult for northerners in the South, and many times it’s deliberately made that way.

    @Shruthi: I understand your sentiments. I also feel the same way when someone generalises and says ‘all Bongs are bad’ kind of a thing. But try to understand, a person does not go and do a door-to-door survey to form an opinion about a city or community He/she forms an opinion by looking at the people he/she directly comes in contact with in day to day life. So if some person says “most Kannadigas (or Bongs) are bad”, it only shows that most who interacted with that person are bad. It may not be the correct opinion, but life’s like that! Have to accept it. 😦

  45. @Rahul: I understand that its was an honest mistake on your part 🙂 but it was a big mistake nevertheless. There is only one Yourfan on this blog , the original fan!

    @GB- what an imginative post that was! Now I see that this discussion has taken a different course on wheather Kannadigas are good or bad, that age old north south thing and most importantly if pointing fingers at Bengal after all these smacks of double standards or not (A point not missed by the ever-alert Yourfan) . Now having worked in Bangalore for a while i know quite a bit about the city and the people. The word Bangalore is used very generically nowadays and conjures up visions of Electronics city. What most people dont realise is that in and around electronics city there are slums where very poor people live. IT boom has benefitted many and given Bangalore a worldwide name but it has also created severe economic disparities.

    But Rajkumar dead makes me feel sad and sometimes I miss the city, specially the pubs and the rock-shows and memories of several females. I had several great moments in Bangalore, several fantastic drink-days and drug-nights with friends at MS Ramaiah hostel and IISC.

    To understand the fact that there are many Bangalores within 1 city, one should start from the majestic bus stop near the railway station. When a bus arrives, watch the crowd. Leave alone any other city, but even dogs would be ashamed to get into a bus pulling and pushing each other like that. It is a real scene and made me laugh silently …people would think Calcutta is old and sans transportation but Bangalore is so high tech with well-mannered people. The police is also equally corrupt as in any other place. I myself have had several pangas with the bangalore police, wheather it be due to an hoysala jeep in my ass while I was driving madly at well over 100 on my rd-350 after buying marijuana or those breathalyzer checks after coming out of Styx or Purple Haze , or bribing the person at the RTO or the passport office or even the police themselves when they towed my bike away while I went to see Deep Purple at concert. But no, I dont think that Kanndigas are ill-cultured, so to speak. They are actually quite mild. Tamils and Telegus are more brasher than them. A few years ago, noone would speak hindi in Chennai railway station, yet the Hindi movies would run houseful.

    Yet I have felt the undercurrent of discontent in the ordinary kanndiga. He is content with his bisi-bele bath and Rajkumar flicks. He doesnt hate the north Indian but doesnt quite admire his brashness and expressive demeanour or his propensity to speak his mind. Sometimes he feels that his city of tranquility, of Mysore Paks and 12 types of rasam thalis is being hijacked by raucousness and Chana batora. He frowns that something as alien as Gobi manchurian is considered native. As a result he grumbles ” baddi maga, hutchsulemaga “. Irrespective of north or south, people get along if they are liberated in their minds (most are after smoking:)).It when the above described southie and the closed minded northie who thinks that all south indians are nothing but “chootiyas and m c’s ” come together that the problem begins. To see the Bangalore I have described, you have to go to majestic, to malleshwaram, to yelahanka and to Boomasandra. You will see the Bangalore you see on Tv in Brigade, Airport road, Koramangla etc etc.

    Coming to Rajkumar, while most filmstars are adored he was actually venerated and espacially so by the common man. This could be gauged from the fact as to how the city felt after he was kidnapped many summers ago. This collective loss of their father’s (ok elder brother) shaked and stirred several souls and led to this pathetic behaviour. But this will pass off as a one off incident but Eden Gardens will always be touted as a violence prone area. Its hard to break stereotypes when the other party is quite loathe to de-stereoptype. You know quite a bit about this GB, dont you? But do we care, GB? No 🙂 This incident is just a case in point. There are several other incidents all over india …but the people of that particular state will say…”hey no….not all of us…just a few rotten eggs “. Sachin booed….theyll say….” oh some useless fellows”.
    Precisely…..and from now on when you get stereotyped wrongly …. you should think twice about branding and stereotyping others.

  46. YOURFAN writes:
    @GB: I don’t know why but now a days you send your reply to your readers’ comment a bit late. Of course that is your decision. But the fact I am mentioning this is because if you did (like you used to before) then by now I would have understood whether you understood the point that I made in my comment to which Rahul has objections. Do you feel that I was not able to realize what spirit this post was written? I am asking this question to you since Rahul wrote: “U claim to be a fan of Arnab and his blog… so I expected at least you to realize what spirit this post was written in (arnab??). And u feel that its relevant to this post???? how pray???”

    @Rahul: As far as I am concerned, let me tell you that I perfectly understood the spirit of this post. I never said that the media is condoning the violence but they are not calling Bangalorians irrationally emotional like they branded the Bengalis with regard to their reaction relating cricket/Sourav. I also made my comments for certain readers of GB who don’t miss the slightest scope to brand Bengalis with derogatory remarks yet now they are absolutely silent. As you are a regular reader of this post, I am sure you know who I am talking about.

    @All: I abhor any sort of generalization and branding based on cast, religion, region, economic status etc. How a person behaves is solely his responsibility – has nothing to do with anybody of his cast, region, religion, economic status or even his family members.

  47. @Debolin –
    yeah , u have to face difficulties being an outsider (or North Indian – as u like to say) in this part of the country.
    but tell me , is it not the same for ANY outsider in ANY place in the world..? On a larger scale , Indians face problems in USA.
    All i wanna say is , this is the part n parcel of the whole package. You benifit from moving to B’lore , this city offers you somethings tht other cities can’t , right? so along with it there will be some difficulties.
    and those are not region/city/nation specific. they are everywhere u go. that’s all.

  48. For those who were not present in Bangalore on the 13th and 14th of April …

    Sorry, Arnab…for wasting lots of space…but I thought it was necessary. Be rest assured, as far as this topic is concerned, this is going to be my last comment here.

  49. @ALL: Checked my blog this morning—-right now I am travelling and so it may be some while before I got around to replying to the comments. And yourfan, there is no delay in replying as a matter of principle—I had a deadline last week and I am travelling all this week. As an aside, I totally understand the spirit in which you made the comment and I share the sentiment myself (the selective finger-pointing thing).Will get back to everyone asap.

  50. @ Joy Forever : I really dont understand how, “How many (small) restaurants serve North Indian food in Chennai? Things are more difficult for northerners in the South, and many times it’s deliberately made that way.”, works…. Mayb the local administration wont allow licenses to small restaurants wanting to serve North Indian food. And if someone says Kokata is the worst regarding Bandhs and stuff, he/she has no idea about Kerala.. 🙂

    @ Yourfan : C’mon my friend. I remember TOI calling tamilians much more than emotionally irrational for the MGR aftermath…. and topping that for the Khusboo Temple (not that they were praise worthy).
    But, I agree with you that generalisations are wrong. So lets leave it at that and not go into unnecessary arguements…

  51. @Rahul: I did not say that the local administration does not allow restaurants to serve North Indian food. It’s just that the restaurant owners don’t bother. Their attitude is, “If you have come to Chennai, you have to eat South Indian food”. Personally I like south Indian food, and I must admit that the south Indian food that I get here in Hyderabad is inedible compared to the Chennai food which was real tasty. But I have the option of eating north Indian food (equally inedible, I admit :)) here which I did not have in Chennai. I won’t go into the argument whether they should serve North Indian food in Chennai or not. Whatever be the reason, the fact still remains that it makes the Northerner’s life more difficult.
    Don’t think I like to generalise, and say that “North is all good, South is all bad” crap (you may read this if you want to know my opinion). I like Hyderabad. I like Chennai. I also like Kolkata. But one should have the courage to accept the fault in one’s own city/state, especially before pointing fingers at others for the same fault.

  52. Great post Arnab, love your humor as always.

    Since many unrelated topics have already come in, thought I would add my bit:

    1. I feel that the Kolkata people’s response to the Sourav Ganguly issue was less offensive than what happened in Bangalore on RajKumar’s death. In Bangalore, there were riots, vandalism and attacks. In Kolkata, there were bandhs, demonstrations, slogan shouting and effigy burning (I might be wrong if I say this is an absoutely accurate assessment, but in general, Bangalore witnessed more violence). While I consider it silly to shut down your business if Ganguly is dropped, it is still within the rights of a shopkeeper to do so. Same goes for demonstrations, effigy burning, and for not supporting India at the Eden Gardens ODI. But violent attacks, riots etc are intolerable, on whatever pretext. And as far as cricket is concerned, I remember there were demonstrations in Bangalore in the late 90s when Kumble and Dravid had been dropped from the ODI squad (pre Ganguly captaincy era). On the other hand Hyderabad saw no protests when a player as good Laxman was dropped from the WC 2003 squad in favor of the never-played-again Dinesh Mongia.

    2. Regarding the opinion held by some (including Arnab) about the rampant anti-Gangulyism = anti-Bengalism, recently many stadiums (outside Bengal) have witnessed slogans of “Bring back Ganguly”.. Tendulkar was booed at Mumbai. There were jokes made about Tendulkar’s appearing and disappearing injuries on the Great Indian Comedy show. Even years back, Azhar’s batting used to be a regular butt of jokes on Shekhar Suman’s Movers and Shakers. I just mention this to indicate that its not true that only Ganguly was subject to criticism and jokes. If even an icon like Tendulkar is booed and joked about, is it possible that the notion of Ganguly being singled out for flak was not true to the extent that some people thought? Just a thought, but please dont anybody start making personal comments and attacks if you dont like it.

  53. YOURFAN writes”
    @Rahul: I would have agreed with your “So lets leave it at that and not go into unnecessary arguements…” if you accepted that your observation/remark about me not understanding the spirit of GB’s post was totally wrong. You did no such thing. The reason I am replying to your last comment is that you questioned my sense of understanding. I did understand it correctly. The sole reply from GB meant for all where he briefly replies to me “I totally understand the spirit in which you made the comment and I share the sentiment myself (the selective finger-pointing thing)” corroborates that I understood the spirit all right. It is you who somehow did not understand the spirit. That would have been all right with me had it not been that you had to dig by saying “U claim to be a fan of Arnab and his blog… so I expected at least you to realize what spirit this post was written in (arnab??). And u feel that its relevant to this post???? how pray???” I dislike your assessment about my understanding capability which is based on your wrong understanding of the point that I made and your inability to accept that and thus calling for a “lets leave it at that”. I must say that I feel proud to be a fan of GB only because it seems his line of thinking and looking at life in general tallies with mine (barring a very few topics)and most importantly he writes so well(whereas I can’t write at all).

    You wrote “I remember TOI calling tamilians much more than emotionally irrational for the MGR aftermath”. I don’t consider TOI to be my type of newspaper so I don’t read it. I was talking about main stream.

    Your explanation given to Joy Forever “Maybe the local administration wont allow licenses to small restaurants wanting to serve North Indian food” defies any logic. It is simply a demand/supply issue unless of course you argue that serving “North Indian food” is unhealthy and thus the local admin doesn’t allow “North Indian Food”!!

    @Hariprasad Poojary: I think you have read my comments to Rahul. What I meant about double standard is nothing but “the selective finger-pointing thing” mentioned by GB.

    @Yourfan2: I know you made the comment to Rahul “There is only one Yourfan on this blog , the original fan!” lightheartedly. But seriously and honestly, I think you are a much more diehard fan of GB than me. Just because I used the name ‘yourfan’ first does not mean that I am the “original one” and the “only one”. All of GB’s fans are “original ones” in his/her own rights. Besides I definitely don’t want to remain the only one – I want the yourfan brigade to grow and I am delighted to be with you in that brigade.

    @GB: Happy and safe traveling. Are on a holiday or on business? Good luck with whatever you do.

  54. @ Yourfan : V r totally on different pages. Please understand, as I think Joy Forever did, that my comment about the restaurants was made in jest and not a logical explanation.
    Since Arnab feels that you have got the spirit right, I understand that I am the one on the wrong page. My apologies to you on that front. Its just that I (wrongly) felt that there was no need to drag regionalism into such a topic.

    @ Joy Forever : I am actually from Kerala and I really do think that there are a lot of North India dining options here. I did do my PG from gaziabad and ate roti’s and aloo parathas, dum aloo, aloo simla mirch and other aloo dishes for 2 years…. how i hate aloo :-). So i do understand where u r coming from. I used to work in Hyd for more than a year and I remember that there are quite a few Dhabas scattered arnd… and if u need good punju food…try the restaurant in karkhana, dont remember the name, but it is just 100 meters after the Satyam bldg there. 🙂

    Sorry I am blabbering too much..

  55. @dEbOLiN
    I know you ended the conversation, but I could not resist pitching in my 2 paise worth. I am a southie, grew up in Bombay(Mumbai, whatever), worked in Delhi and Bangalore for a couple of years each and I can tell you, in any part of the world, you ARE going to see this. I have had lousy times in Mumbai because of being a southie (never mind my speaking fluent Hindi and Marathi), seen absurd things in Delhi because of being from Mumbai and seen a lot of what you talked about in Bangalore for not knowing Kannada. It’s not a big deal, no one likes outsiders.
    Ask a native Bangalorean what he thinks of people from Belgaum 🙂 Ask a Andhra-ite from Vizag, what he feels about people from Hyderabad, ask a Allahabad guy, what he feels about people from Kanpur …
    In India people have too many divisions. The Iyers don’t like the Iyengars even if they are next door neighbours, heck, they are from the same city, religion, langauage everything!
    So don’t feel too bad, get on with life. But trust me, after Delhi, Bangalore was one of the most welcoming city.It has always had the ability to welcome and accept outsiders. I have never understood what it is about (WARNING, random generalization ahead!) the Jats and Punjabis that end up in their having a nose in the air superior attitude. They do it to you if you go to their land and they do it to you if they come to yours. I guess it is the centuries of living on the western frontier and having to face aggressions that has culturally moulded them into an aggressive people 🙂

  56. YOURFAN writes:
    @Rahul: Apologies accepted. On a silly note: why did you eat aloo all the time at Gaziabad for 2 whole years? You mean Gaziabad near Delhi? What happened to non-veg meals and other vegs? Just curious.

  57. @Arnab,
    Great post..hilarious as ever.

    @Debashish and some others,
    U may have mentioned the topic as unrelated. But comparisons of Raj kumar and Ganguly are unrelated.and where does Laxman fit into the picture?? It is like comparing the end(demise/drop) of an ant (Laxman) , mouse (Ganguly) and elephant (Raj Kumar). When Dravid and Kumable were dropped, there were demonstrations no doubt, but it was very minor. Anyway, Raj Kumar is a considered as a god to millions of people in Karnataka, and people will be angry if his body is not shown to people after his death. Though, the actual violence was not by his fans, but it were all a political game. While he is being buried, oppostion leaders started giving statements that the current government is responsible for this violence and was demanding the resignation, at the burial site. There is a big chance that they only had sent hooligans to create trouble. Really feels bad to see all those events, though. If Raj Kumar was from Bengal, the same thing would have happened at Kolkata, I feel Bangalore cannot be blamed for it.

  58. @Vikas: When I said it was unrelated, I also meant to imply that the two situations are not exactly compareable (although I should have been more explicit). What I was trying to do was to differentiate between acceptable and unacceptable forms of expression/protest to events like dropping Ganguly or Raj Kumar’s death: events in which the people who are being disadvantaged by the protests were at no fault at all. A shop being closed may disadvantage me but my rights are not violated. However, if my car is burnt, I am not only disadvantaged but my rights are also violated.
    I did not at all mean to compare Kolkata and Bangalore as you seem to think.. and if you’re trying to softly judge the recent events in Bangalore by saying that the same thing would have happened in Kolkata (or any other city), that is nothing but idle speculation (absolutely anything is possible, but so what!) – unless you can show me some past precedents to back up your assertion. After all, Raj Kumar cannot have been the first regional/national film star to have passed away.

    As regards Dravid/Kumble demonstrations being minor, that is true but then Dravid wasn’t even a proven asset in the ODI game back then. And there were no non-cricketing reasons behind them being dropped (at least no obvious ones). In Ganguly’s case, he was the captain, and although his cricket had definitely deteriorated a lot, the focus at that time was on his spat with Chappell.. so dropping him drew more attention for that reason. I doubt Kolkata would have witnessed nearly as many demonstrations had he been dropped only because of his deteriorating performance as player/captain. So the scale of the demonstrations and protests must be judged in the context of the situation.

  59. @debashish,
    Even I am not comparing Kolkata and Bangalore and I was not pointing my finger to anyone when I made that statement, but I just took Kolkata as an example for any other city apart from Bangalore. What I was tyring to convey is that the magnitude of respect and love which Raj Kumar had earned in Karnataka, like MGR in TN, was so much that, if he was from some other state and equally popular like he was here, then, similar events “could” have occurred in other cities also. Many people blame Bangalore in particular and most of them are Northies, and I just wanted to state that is wrong and the city could not be blamed for it. I know there is no proof, and hopefully, there will not be any in the future also, but it is just my opinion, based on the fact that, as a Bangalorean, I know how much the localites love him.
    and like I said before, the violence was not by his fans, and just some hooligans, who found a good reason to create havoc as they knew the entire city will be shocked and in grief..

  60. Strikes me as a little strange that “Naarth Indyaans” who are here for aeons, love this place, want to make this their home yada yada havent managed to learn a smattering of the local lingo. Which apparently, leads to their downfall in social standing or some such. *Yawn* Does it need Einstein to figure that out?

  61. Typppiccal southie is quite common in the north… and i’ve been told quite a few times that i don’t talk with the accent of a typppiccal southie and am generally expected to feel proud about it.
    It’s just a matter of how much you crib about things

  62. Blaming kannadigas for the violence is like blaming the the hindi populace for the reservation deal… think about it

  63. Sigh – I little funny post has become a battle between liguistic entities. Listen, I’m a Bong living in Bombay, I do get harassed (was once actually) by a cop who refused to talk to me in Hindi and told me if I can’t speak Marathi “What the F*** I was doing in Bombay?” I quietly listened, seething inside, more so because the Bombay Police Commissioner is a … Bong. This happens everywhere, not just Bangalore – the local populace feel that they are being subjugated by outsiders – mainly North Indians.
    However, why do people forget that at the end of the day we all support the same (often lousy) cricket team – no one thinks of Amitabh Bachchan as a Delhi-ite UP-Boy or his son as a Half-Bong Half-Bhaiyya mix. I find these arguments inane – especially on Blogs – Yeah, sure I do get a bit parochial at times – but my Passport doesn’t say ‘West Bengal’ it says ‘India’. All of India’s cities and companies (even those based in Bangalore) have been built on the backs of Indians – not the backs of particular communities. I think people who demand reservations on the basis of linguistic/regionalistic basis are worse than those ******* who raise caste based issues. In a way, I hope Rajkumar’s passing will end this entire ‘Kannadiga’ nonsense. Trust me, it will be for the good of that city.

  64. @arnab: howlarious post. But the most I love is the 1 abt Calcutta Book fair. Me and baba (my dad) too used to make trips of book fairs together and still cherish those moments.
    @K: well said.

  65. My note below is completely unrelated to what you folks are discussing. But since greatbong posted few days ago about Cynthia Mckinney I thought may be I could share this to you.
    Apparently she has always been the one who blows the whistle, but plugged by high handed lords of WH. the link below (I don’t know how much credible it is though) explains how was she repeatedly made target of conspiracy

    http://www.gregpalast.com/detail.cfm?artid=229&row=1

  66. @ Yourfan : Unfortunately I used to masquarade as a bram veggie at that time till the viles of the ‘flesh’, errr… hope u get which flesh i mean, caught up with me. My hostel mess was a part of the potato nexus as every dish… even rajma used to have it *shudder*. Since the fiscal budgeting was more focused on the ‘spirit’ual side, it was aloo or nothing… *sigh*

  67. Hilarious post arnab,

    @true kannadiga
    Are others false Kannadigas ??

    I find it shameful that ppl within India from different regions fight so much among themselves. We should stop focussing on petty regional stuff and think of the country as a whole. I am getting bored with this frequent North vs South stuff.. If you have some spare time, go watch a movie, or better, do something useful to the world or to the country .

  68. @True Kannadiga,

    First Up, What a brilliant name! You do have creative imagination!
    I simply don’t understand what is the problem with some of you over there. In any topic that is being debated, you would definitely drag Tamilians and Chennai bit. Here, people were responding to Debolin’s generalizations and Anand’s comments and you are defending the violence by saying that the same would have happened in Chennai or Jhumri Talaiyya. The point is not that it would have happened anywhere else but that it should not happen. Any destruction of public property cannot be condoned. The sickening violence that followed would definitely gladden Rajkumar’s heart. Wouldn’t it?

    HP

  69. @Debolin,

    Yes, I was born in Karnataka. So, I have some rights over being called a Kannadiga. Well, some of the points that you mentioned about the auto-drivers was very true. I went and saw the links too. So, most of the rant was devoted to cops and auto-drivers. Well, Really Sorry that you had to face such things in Bangalore. May the government take some real strict action against the corrupt cops and the other anti-social elements.

    HP

    PS : The previous comment is also mine , just that I forgot to add my details 🙂

  70. @To the rest of the ppl,

    According to me, Bangalore definitely has a lot of infrastructure problems and that is not going to improve if more and more IT companies keep going there. So, I always feel happy when I hear that the IT companies are moving to different parts of the country. Frankly, once I would like the IT cos stop threatening and start investing out of Banaglore.. It would help to spread the development to other states too.
    Infy has a centre in Orissa and that place is too good to stay! More such centres are required in the northern and the eastern part of the country. Calcutta and Gurgaon are doing great and hopefully, the desired centres in Rajasthan and MP also come through. And probably, some far sighted investor will tap the big market in the north-eastern states.

    Also, isn’t it strange that inspite of travelling to different places in India and staying there, we share this great divide. We will call names on the slightest provocation.
    Reminds me of a poem I had read in school. Dont know the exact words, but they had conveyed the following meaning..

    In down South, I am a Tamilian, For fellow Tamilians I am a Tam-Brahm,
    For people beyond the Vindhyas, I am a Madrasi,
    Outside, I am called an Indian,
    Well, who am I?

    Well, maybe we will all find the answer for that question!!!!!!

    Arnab,

    Forgot to tell this before but the post was too good 🙂 I have also ranted about Emraan before ..Well leave it..Need to have dinner now 🙂

    And really apologetic for using too much of your comment space to respond to other people’s comments.

    Cheers,
    HP

  71. er, this is a racist/regional anecdote. read at your own risk.

    in the good ole days of CCCP (USSR to the non-philatelists)
    the armenians went to moscow and demanded that their state should be allowed to have a Ministry of Marine Affairs.
    moscow was astonished– why? they said– you are a land locked sort of place.
    then why — replied the armenians– do the azerbaijanis have a ministry of culture?

    ps– this joke was alright when told by azerbaijanis. when told by armenians it led to riots.

    moral of the story is–
    its alright to criticise ones own but heaven help you if you are going to be a ‘foreign’ critic and adopt a holier than thou attitude.

  72. @Ali: 🙂

    @Apoorva: Thanks..

    @yourfan: And a happy subho nabarbasha to you and your family from all of us. I agree that much is made of “crowd violence” at Eden (you wont believe how many blogs and posts on Orkut I have seen which basically say :–>Kolkata is unfit to host any international match). From a purely cricketing perspective, there are several other centers that have had incidents of crowd violence (including Chennai and Bangalore) and so this “holier-than-thou” attitude is of course puzzling. Again this is not to meant as a saction for the behvior of Calcutta crowds but is a mention against selective finger-pointing.

    @deBoLiN: Not having stayed at Bangalore I cannot comment on your assessment of the police force there—-I frankly didnt think a force more corrupt than Calcutta Police could exist.

    @raj: The reason for that, rather than any kind of inherent violent gene of the south, could just be that South Indian stars are far more political animals than their Northern counterparts. The violence after MGR’s death was purely political and even raj Kumar had made several political stances before, appealing to Kannadiga pride.

    @Amit: Himesh sir had long since passed away…after spending one too many “Zahereele Raatein”…if you know what I mean.

    @Shils: Death: the great equalizer.

    @Badshah: Thank you…yes I am wrong in that respect.

    @Crucifire: I would think not. Unless Mr Hasmi went political. Now that would be funny….almost like Aamir khan’s “politics”.

    @Anil: But I have read that he definitely had a political stance especially in the issue of Telegu vs Tamil cinema in Bangalore which had lead him to be a icon of Kannadiga pride. The behavior of the crowd, surely a minority of the people of bangalore, is truly baffling.

    @Shri: 🙂

    @Manasi: A mad rush for her remains.

    @Anand: It is sad that the actions of a few damn the majority. However shouldnt we resist the use of language like “bloody Kannadigas” as damning the whole due to the behavior of a few is something all of us agree is unfair ?

    @K: 🙂

    @Rahul: The issue of the “double standard” has been cleared up hopefully. I dont think there was any double standard in what yourfan said….absolutely the opposite.

    @Joy Forever: Well there is logic behind that. They may be passionate about their film stars there but their work culture is far better than ours, in general. If I am crazy for Rajani, then its fine—Infosys shouldnt care. However if every two months, I dont come to work once a day because mamata-didi or subhas-kaku has stopped all transporation, then yes Houston Infosys may have a problem.

    @Shruti: I agree. Phrases like “bloody Kannadigas” are highly improper.

    @Saswati: Mob frenzy. When Indira Gandhi died, my dad’s bus was stopped by Congress goons and not allowed to go to IIM—they said “Ma is dead and you people dare go to work?”

    @deBoLiN: Why make a distinction between high class and low class—doesnt this sound extremely elitist? In a place like Bangalore, where outsiders have come in and raised standard of living so high that so-called “low class” people cannot afford to stay in the city of their forefathers, such intolerance is but natural. It exists in all cities of India—so again why finger point? Dont Bengalis also grudge the power of Marwaris in calcutta?

    @Cipher: Oh man…the end of the world as we know it.

    @Ali: Ahem.

    @BongoPondit: When I heard them stoning MS research, I assumed this was a conspiracy hatched by Linux users of Bangalore. Hows that for a conspiracy theory,Ali?

    @Varsha: It is very real.

    @Shirsoft: Again Rajkumar is more a cultural icon than a filmstar.

    @Right: Exactly. Its there in every state…..watch Hindi movies of the 60s/70s and see their portrayal of “Tamilians” to see how deeply stereotypical it was.H

    @HP: I think you have misinterpreted what yourfan said.

    @Suyog: 🙂

    @Shreemoyee: :-)….And I thought his real name was “I-am-a-man Kiss-Me”.

    @Patient Portnoy: Subho Noroborsho.

    @Aditya: I dont see any “voilent lobh story” anywhere—-so why should Bollywood care?

    @Anon: An appeal. Can anyone please upload MLA Fatakeshto on Google video or yourtube? I am dying to see it.

    @The Wanderer: An interesting analysis.

    @Ranjan: What I have been told (second hand information of course) is that real-estate prices have increased so much, driven by the IT boom, that many salaried native Bangaloreans (rather than businessmen who of course have benefitted from the boom) find themselves priced out of the place where they have stayed for many years. Something, on a much reduced scale, has happened in Bengal too—-I cannot tell you how many times I have heard Bengalis rue that its no longer possible for bengalis to stay in their own city—thanks to the Marwaris.
    @Percy: Exactly. No need for the blame others game.
    @Nilesh: Yes Hindi as the national language. Maybe a future post with a lot of fireworks comments…
    @jEDI: 🙂

    @ True Kannadiga:

    Three lines from your comment:

    i think the attitude of the Northies needs to change especially when it comes to integrating with the south and its culture.

    . “i think one must stay in chennai for few months to really appreciate the weather, local people of bangalore.

    i just want to make a point to all that, pls let us not abuse any language/religion

    Ahem.

    @ Shruti: No need to apologize. The well-thought-out comments of readers like you are exactly what makes blogging such a rewarding experience for me.

    @Raj: Hmm…

    @yourfan2: An aside: with all the pot, girls and purple haze, you had a great time in Bangalore ! And as always, an excellent comment—worthy of a  blog post in itself.”

    @Debashish: With regards to point 2, it might disappoint you to know that at least one of those “Bring back Ganguly” demonstrations was stage-managed by a channel. (Link no longer available). Not relevant here—but my objection was not to Shekhar Suman making jokes about Sourav but comments on the line of “Bloody Bong b*****”…or “look at his fielding. Typical Bong fitness”…. or “Ki dada, will dada score 1 run?”—-as if I am somehow Ganguly’s girlfriend.

    @Yourfan: Strictly business.

    @Vikas: Just a comment. If Rajkumar had been from Bengal, would the same thing have happened? Well let’s see. Satyajit Ray is a huge icon in Bengal….universally considered to be the “last great Renaissance man”. When he died, there were scenes of great grief in Kolkata and no rioting. The only problem was a local goon at the burning ghats creating a scene and calling out the Police Comissioner’s name (on the lines of “Tum saale mere kya bigaroge…I am friends with so-and-so) when arrested—an act that led to the Police commisioner losing his job within a week.

    Now I am not saying Bengal is superior. The reason why nothing bad happened was because Ray was a cultural icon and not political. In other words, he was never associated with the “Bengali identity” in any overt way. In contast, if today Sourav Ganguly dies or commits suicide, I am fairly sure they may be violence on the streets of Calcutta because , for good or for bad, his case has become associated with Bengali pride. (As an aside: Sharad Pawar has been asked by his own party to stay away from Bengal because of the well of “good feeling” his name conjures up)
    @ Pradyot, Anon: Point noted. And inclined to agree with you.

    @K: Interesting irony.

    @Snehal: Thank you..

    @Sandeepan: Interesting link.

    @ Karthik: 🙂

    @Swati: Hilarious…
    @Pavan: Most certainly.

  73. Could be stage managed, but that neither disappoints nor pleases me. About the jokes, the reason I mentioned that is because I remember you said in some post/comment that nobody was making “2 minute noodle jokes” when Tendulkar was having a run of poor scores (I assume you were questioning why he was spared when Sourav had not been). Anyway, it seems your opinion on this issue stems much more (perhaps entirely) from your personal experience at Stonybrook than I had thought.

  74. @Arnab,
    Yes the real estate prices in Bangalore have really shot up. But that is something happening in every city. Still the real estate prices there are half of what they are in Mumbai where the “outsiders” have lesser stake. I think you have a point here.

    I knew what you told about Kolkata. One of my “Bengali” friends used to stay there in Kakurgachhi which is supposed to be a major “Marwari” locality specially the lane where he lived. And I being a “Marwari” by birth (by practise I am sure that I will be called the black sheep of the community) used to be get teased major time :-).

  75. @Debashish: Do read the editorial of HT when it was suggested that Bengal be cut out from the country and sent to Bangladesh. Dont think that qualifies for a Stonybrook only experience.

    @Ranjan: Yes totally understand.

  76. I made my original comment because I was just curious if jokes about Tendulkar’s form or injuries at all change your opinion about the extent to which Ganguly was specially singled out for the same. From your past comments (like the one I mentioned), you seemed to think that was the case to a large extent. If this is a wrong assessment on my part, ok. Otherwise, I think my question about the jokes is a valid one since in my opinion it is only now that Sachin is really going through bad form (not to mention the injuries) comparable to Sourav’s bad form. And I share your distaste for abusive comments about Sourav (or anybody else), but that is a slightly different issue which I was not alluding to in my question.

    As for the anti-Bong media bias, it may very well be true. I dont think I surf the Indian news websites that much to comment on it.

  77. @GB : Thats a far better one. I personally feel that all MS office attacks and viruses have always been the doing of Linux Fans. “You think our UI is bad? Well we can spoil yours!!” 😀

  78. I have never questioned your penchant for tacky movies, but do you think it’s in good taste to show so blatantly such deep knowledge of that man’s films? I mean, we must draw the line somewhere, eh?

    You know your business best of course, but I’m a little saddened. In the years to come, when your grandchildren cluster around your knees and clamour to hear about the movies you wrote about, will you not shrink a little and try to avoid the Hashmi topic? Is this what you would want them to rememebr you by?

    On a different note, finally I have some time to read blogs, hurray!

  79. Looks strangely like the Rajkoumar incident, were you motivated by that? Don’t know if you have already answered that above. Too ,many comments to read through!

  80. YOURFAN writes:
    @GB, you wrote to deBoLiN: “Why make a distinction between high class and low class—doesn’t this sound extremely elitist?” It is not elitist – it is flat out wrong just as the usage of ‘bloody’ by one of the readers was flat out wrong. (For EVERYBODY to see that here I am disagreeing with GB). As I have already mentioned that human behavior is not caste, economic statues, region, religion specific –it is exclusively person specific. I have seen very rich or supposedly ‘educated’ people behave so ugly as if they own the world and at the same time I have seen people with less institutional education having profound knowledge regarding life and a hell lot of compassion which is missing from so called rich ‘educated’ people.

    One more point: You have written in your reply to other readers “…people cannot afford to stay in the city of their forefathers, such intolerance is but natural. It exists in all cities of India—so again why finger point? Dont Bengalis also grudge the power of Marwaris in calcutta?”
    “……I have heard Bengalis rue that its no longer possible for bengalis to stay in their own city—thanks to the Marwaris”
    You are absolutely correct. It is very very true that Marwaris have invaded all the Bengali bastions with their money power and Bengalis are being pushed to suburbs because of law of economics. And this is going on for quite a long time yet there is no open dislike to Marwaris. The very big difference is that Begalis don’t show their displeasure about that directly to Marwaris like the unhappy experiences faced by the readers who made comments in this post. May be they talk about their discontent in their own private adda. One proof of not showing the displeasure directly to Marwaris is that the Bengalis make it a point to talk to them in Hindi and NOT in Bengali – have you noticed that – the difference? Hold it, I am not suggesting that Bengalis are any better than anybody – all I am saying is that the Bengalis are different – kind of like the Maggi tomato sauce which is ‘different’!! It is for the sociologist to say why the Bengalis act ‘different’ – it is not my forte. It is just my observation.

    Lastly, your anecdote regarding your dad’s encounter with the doctor in your previous post’s reply to Rani, is hilarious because as I have read somewhere in your blog that your mother’s background is also economics, she must have felt exasperated at both the doctor and specially your father for not taking the issue up!!!

  81. @ anon (YOURFAN) :,

    I might or might not have been right when I used the term ‘low-class’ while tliking about people falling in the lower middle-class group like auto-wallahs, greedy landlords, cops and so on in Bangalore. ‘Right’ and ‘Wrong’ are very much relative terms. It all depends on how one takes things. And from the strong reaction to my comments , I feel I couldn’t put it the way I actually wanted to. When I said ‘low-class’, I was refering to the relatively less-educated, less-privileged and therefore more insecure and regionally biased portion of the Bangalore population. It was never my intention to divide people on the basis of their caste/religion or economic status. If you think I did so, I’m really really really sorry for that. My sincere apologies to all.

    However, as you wrote…..
    “The very big difference is that Begalis don’t show their displeasure about that directly to Marwaris like the unhappy experiences faced by the readers who made comments in this post.”
    ….I must say you are bang on !!!
    This actually sums up what I wanted to say in so many words but couldn’t in a very suggestive and elegant way.
    Thanks a lot.

  82. To yourfan2:

    “But this will pass off as a one off incident but Eden Gardens will always be touted as a violence prone area. Its hard to break stereotypes when the other party is quite loathe to de-stereoptype. You know quite a bit about this GB, dont you? But do we care, GB? No This incident is just a case in point. There are several other incidents all over india …but the people of that particular state will say…”hey no….not all of us…just a few rotten eggs “. Sachin booed….theyll say….” oh some useless fellows”.”

    Since it’s directed to our ilk (Bongs) I thought I would respond. De-stereotyping Bengalis. Laughable. First, the bongs could not care less on how a northie or a southie stereotypes us. I mean, do you really think that your stereotyping is that important to us that we will start changing our basic fundamentals. Our basic fundamentals are based on standing up against injustices (not aborting female fetus in the north or burning shops because some actor has died). This has been our history for a looong time now. Its not gonna change now just because ‘yourfan2’ does not like it. Sorry. We do not care two hoots about ‘de-stereotyping’ us, because we love our stereotype. I will give you our stereotype – arts and culture inclined – caste free and religion free society. Guess what, I would like to remain this forever, while you in north burn each other in the name of X cast. And violence, yes, here is a link from a BBC story celebrating 100 years of the cellular jail:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/4792576.stm

    I quote from the article:
    “More than 70% of the Cellular Jail’s inmates were from Bengal, where activists preferred to fight rather than Gandhian non-violence.”

    Yeah, and I thought Andaman was closer from Chennai, Bangalore and Hyderabad.
    Oh, and a couple more things, those were not Bengalis who were booing Tendulkar in Mumbai and if you remember once people were throwing bottles at Eden Gardens was because Tendulkar was unfairly judged run out. Go figure (or kill another female fetus).

  83. Great Indian (Anand’ian’)….Let us stop this fighting within ourselves…Dr Rajkumar is a great human being, pls see him as a true Indian and respect him….Dont give free suggestions about people of karnataka as u r from US/UK…We people of Karnataka OR We Kannadigas know how to manage our state…we need not go and ask judgement from Britishers again…Jai Hind…Jai Karnataka…Surya Chandrariruva Tanaka..Dr Raj hesaru Amara…

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