It’s tough being a MLA in Bihar.
While members of most state legislative assemblies engage in mutual kung-fu fighting, the MLAs of Bihar are a different breed altogether, ceaselessly toiling and travelling with nary a thought for their individual gratification, gathering information and gainfully spending tax money on constructive causes.
Consider the case of this mammoth contingent of Bihari MLAs who were sent by Bihar CM Nitish Kumar on an all-expense-paid 10-day “study tour” of Thailand to investigate ways and means to control AIDs. After all, for one of the poorest states in India, what could be a better use of money than to send 15 MLAs to Thailand—-a lesser leader would have spent that money on providing better facilities to health officials inside the state. But not Nitish. He knows that when you send a group of 15 Bihari MLAs into a den of prostitutes, seminal ideas come spurting out.
Well at least the seminal part is guaranteed.
Barely able to hide their excitement over the experiences on a foreign jaunt, the members of the 15-member Bihar Legislative Forum on HIV/AIDS, including some MLAs were left fending and scurrying for cover after a woman member of the team, Gyanti Devi (member, District Board, Gaya) revealed before the media that most of the legislators “were more interested in massaging”.
Her revelation sent the alarm bells ringing and a quite a few MLAs were seen explaining, “No, I didn’t. Some others enjoyed.”
Barely minutes after Chief Minister Nitish Kumar met the Bihar Legislative Forum members who called on him to apprise him of the tour, Gyanti Devi, while explaining her experience, said that all the MLAs indulged in merry-making. “Massage karate they. Aur kya karte the hum nahi janate (They used to go for massaging. What else they used to do, I don’t know).â€
But ‘hum janate’ what they did…right dear RTDM readers?
Bhudeo Chaudhary, the JD (U) MLA, was quick to deny that he ever went for massaging during the trip. However, he accepted that some MLAs did go to massage parlours. â€œKuchh massage karaye, kuchh nahi (Some got the massage done, some did not). While narrating his experiences of Thailand, Chaudhary said that the country was open to sex.
What surprised everybody was his knowledge about types of massage prevalent in Thailand. â€œWahan tarah-tarah ka massages hota hai (There are various types of massages). Foot massage, half- massage, oil massage, and the whole-body massage.â€¦ foot massage was indeed good for foot,â€ he went on narrating.â€
Of course he declined to add, for which foot.
But the most important piece of knowledge has been conveyed clearly: ” the country is open to sex”.
Which means a follow-up visit by 15 other devoted MLAs is in order—with care being taken to avoid “rang main bhang” “kabab me haddi” people like Gyanti Devi who fail to see the larger picture.
In conclusion, like most of his colleagues, Bhudeo Chaudhary’s attention to pure fact-finding (the corpus of massage knowledge he has brought back) combined with supreme abnegation (he did not enjoy any of these pleasures) is, one must accept, highly touching.
[Link courtesy Saumyadipta Pyne]