Dhoni Bhajji Hai Hai

Bhajji was lucky to escape criminal action after he racially insulted a monkey and then slapped another.

He then further pushed his luck by dancing dressed as Ravana with Mona Singh as Sita. This greatly insulted people who found the fact that Ravana and Sita could dance together outside the VVS Laxman Rekha to be despicable.

Dhoni too had been pushing the envelope by his acts of random sexiness which were also pretty offensive, like him allowing his name to be used in songs like “Set kara di life he Baba Dhoni sang hamaar ho” which single (and married) women all over India were singing.

It was only going to be a matter of time before the law would catch up with this duo. And it finally has. A law-suit has been filed against Dhoni and Harbhajan for “defamation, criminal intimidation and intentional insult with intent to provoke breach of peace”.

Why? Because they did not attend the Padmasree awards.

If this does not provoke a breach of peace I do not know what does. Leaving ministers waiting as well as the babylog and babalog of all those VIPs who had gathered for a glimpse and perhaps even an autograph from two of Youngistan’s hottest representatives is positively criminal.

Insulted by this act of gross imprudence, our Sports Minister flayed Dhoni and Harbhajan (without naming them of course) for insulting an award as sought-after as the Padmasree by not attending. While I would have thought that Harbhajan sending Sarandeep Singh and Dhoni sending his body-double may have been a compromise, our Sports Minister would have been insulted even then because he also lashed out at the practice of sportsmen sending their surrogates for such awards.

Maybe they should have given the award to VVS Laxman who the BCCI proposed for the award but the GOI passed over for Harbhajan. Maybe they should just take away the awards of those who do not deign to attend, like they do at some of the Bollywood award nights (It was reported that an actor who was told he/she was being awarded showed up late only to find that they had given the award to someone else). Maybe they should really slap Harbhajan back by making Sreesanth a Padma Sree next year making him a Padma Sree Santh.

To be honest, I am at a loss to suggest what they should do so shocked and offended am I. However, for want of not coming up with a better publicity gimmick, I merely ask that you join me in saying “Dhoni Bhajji Hai Hai”.

[Unrelated comment: Came across this gem today.

Loitering stranger exposed as Anil Kapoor in drag (link)

While researching his role in this week’s re-lease, Black and White, Anil Kapoor donned a burqa to be anonymous so that he could observe the behaviour of the residents of Delhi’s predominantly Muslim Chandni Chowk area, in which the film is set. Everything went well until locals accused the stranger of loitering. The police were called and Kapoor’s identity was revealed.

To the policeman who came in expecting to find a woman behind the burqa and found Anil Kapoor instead, I offer my sympathies. He should have sued someone.]

38 thoughts on “Dhoni Bhajji Hai Hai

  1. ipod !!!

    yeay 🙂

  2. I thought there was a new law in India which fined people 1 lakh for frivolous cases (wasting the time of the court). This seems to be a perfect case to apply that.

  3. Why do u have to pass a racist remark in almost all of your posts when you quote symonds?

  4. spare dhoni,
    yes, bhajji mona hai hai!
    that ravana sita dance was awful

  5. Our great MPs do not realize that they insult the nation by their abysmally low presence in the parliament

  6. If Star News and Aaj Tak were to be believed, it was treason for which even Waghmare won’t have dared to represent them.

  7. Hilarious .. so this case joins the long list of useless PILs.
    Unfortunately, this has put the debate on the list of nominees on the backburner.
    On that note, do check out this song created by a couple of friends, called ‘Bapu bole beta Bindra mat ban na’ :

    Lyrics here :

  8. Can you imagine the shock. You take the mystery woman in and you discover it’s Anil Kapoor! This beats Roald Dahl’s endings any day! A moment of grim jocularity as P.G Wodehouse would say….

  9. @Deepak: This is Hilarious! Brilliant!

  10. Just Imagine a hairy Bear in Burkha 🙂
    i am shivering my self with that thought 🙂


  11. @Tarzan,
    “Imagine a hairy Bear in Burkha”

    I did. 😦

  12. To the policeman who came in expecting to find a woman behind the burqa and found Anil Kapoor instead, I offer my sympathies. He should have sued someone.

    Ha ha ha!!! Good one 🙂

  13. Wonder why Anil Kapoor wore a burqa? He should have just shaved off his chest hair and gone. Nobody would have recognised him!

  14. Dada removed from kaptaani!!!

  15. MF aussies did it again to dada!!

  16. I don’t see what is so funny at the core of this issue that it demands another shallow post.

    True the person who filed the case is a Monkey in Bhajji speak. It is also true our politicians have debased everything (including awards) to a level where people do not care. I also do not agree with MS Gill (sports minister) when he says that it is ‘good fortune’ to receive these awards from the President of India.

    But I do believe that Harbhajan’s remarks were silly – more or less in keeping with his utterances generally. I think he said that next time I get an award I will be there two days in advance. He, by and large, reduced the entire matter to a joke. This was not done but was not very surprising.

    While those who run the state deserve no respect if the institutions also loose respect then it will be a very sad day. Bhajji and Dhoni dare not miss any BCCI/ICC/IPL awards for anything – unwell parents or family time.

    Just because the characters around the drama – the PIL filing ass, the Hindi news channels, Harbhajan Singh, politicians and their progeny deserve no respect let the concept of state awards not be dragged to their level.

  17. Beats me why teh GOI chose Bhajji over VVS, atleast he would have come to the awards ceremony rather than fulfilling his “commercial” commitments 😛

  18. To the Sports Minister who does not recognise Mary Kom and refuses awards, this serves right!

  19. Man! where do u get these links from !! hilarious writing! Padma Sree Santh

  20. I wish Bhaji/Dhoni had responded SRK-style: Those who love Padmashree so much and have problem with me not giving her the attention she deserves should do something with their lives to win her..

  21. Don Ayan de Marco April 17, 2009 — 2:49 pm

    I think Dhoni and Bhajji is inspired from Aamir ‘i m so correct’ Khan.

  22. Greatbong,

    we’re not here talking about any awards. But the 3rd highest civilian awards in the country. Bhajji and Dhoni have been given the status that they don’t deserve. No matter how silly our politicians are but when your country is bestowing an honour on you, you should not make a mockery of it. Bhajji and Dhoni didn’t attend the Padamshree awards even when they were in the country. Sure, the case filed against them is ludicrous but they should be taught some sort of lesson.

  23. Awesome!!!
    I am too small to write a comment for you

  24. @Shalini, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with you… but, Padmashree is not 3rd highest civian award, because Bharatratna, Padmabibhusan & Padmabhusan all come before

  25. “but when your country is bestowing an honour on you, you should not make a mockery of it..but they should be taught some sort of lesson.”

    @Shalini: If Padma awards are so much a matter or national honor, would you be able to name all the recipients of the award this year? In fact, the only reason we know that Bhaji & Dhoni are two of the recipients of these awards is because they didn’t show up. Quite an irony, isn’t it?

    The only awards that we really care about are those that are awarded to us by the ‘goras’..Oscars, Nobel, Booker etc..I’m sure Resul Pookutty, Amartya Sen, Kiran Desai or Arvinda Andiga would have remained non-entities had they not received these ‘foreign’ awards. So before teaching Dhonis & Bhajjis some sort of lesson on preserving national honor, maybe we should first begin learning lessons ourselves and start giving these awards as much importance as we give to foreign awards. (An easier option would be of course to snub or mock awards-shawards of all types..)

  26. By referring to Symonds as ‘monkey’ you are in the same boat as Harbhajan. IMO, racism is far worse a crime than not attending the Padmashree awards, which by the way, have lost any credibility if idiots like Harbhajan and Dhoni and other Bollywood stars are receiving them.

    I’m actually surprised that the government is shocked at their behaviour as they are the epitome of arrogance and this is what you would expect from narcissists. They are too entitled for their own good.

  27. Pysch Babbler: How come referring to Symonds as a monkey is racist and referring to Sreesanth as monkey is not (which I also did but you did not find racist)? Calling me as “being in the same boat as Harbhajan” is racist IMO. How’s that? And I also find you referring to Dhoni and Harbhajan as idiots to be even more racist. So what about that too?

  28. Psych Babbler: This one’s for you..

  29. @essbee I can’t believe that this is the answer u’re giving to my post. I can’t believe you. Of course, people who follow news do hear about Padma Shris. And if u’re so upset about us giving importance to foreign awards, why not start with respecting Padma Shris. You sound as if it’s ok for celebs to snub such awards.

    The reason why I’m against Dhoni and Bhajji in this case is coz cricketers are given undue importance in India. They anyways don’t deserve this kind of respect.

  30. if only there were a padma sreemati award. i bet bhajji ‘o saathee re …” and dhoni would have leaped over the likes of our sallu (in or out of his jeep, in or out of his shirt) or the real sallu.

    now that the entire world knows that bhajji showers once a day, i hope that he does so at the end of the day’s play, not before play begins. on second thoughts, maybe he should do so at the beginning of the day, else the aussies would complain that bhajji stinks.

    either way, that rahasya has to wait until bhajji’s next cricinfo interview.

    – s.b.

  31. I think Dhoni and Bhajji have their priorities right – money before awards any day. After all they play for a private entity, not the government of India. And remember that the Padma awards do not have a cash component. Who would want to travel to Delhi in the heat just to receive a medal from a woman who is just a figurehead?

    If they want our ultra-professional cricketers to come all the way and actually receive awards, from now on they will have to provide at least a crore in cash along with the useless medal.

  32. Actually government is insulting Padam Shree award by giving it to non deserving people like Aishwarya, Akshay, Bhajji etc. Whereas deserving person like Vijendra(medal winner boxer), Sushil (wrestler) are not at all considered.

  33. “And if u’re so upset about us giving importance to foreign awards, why not start with respecting Padma Shris. You sound as if it’s ok for celebs to snub such awards.””

    Shalini, I made a general observation about the importance of foreign awards in India, not a personal statement about my mental condition..:-)

    Its the prerogative of celebrities to show reverence to such awards or snub them. Why should I care either way? Even as a non-entity, I don’t care for these awards and wouldn’t bother to show up if I was to receive it. Its doubtful if I was in Dhoni’s shoes, I would care much. If it hurts you so much that these two have snubbed the padmas, stop treating them as celebrities. You have made them celebrities, you have the power to dethrone them from their lofty pedestals.

    “They anyways don’t deserve this kind of respect.”

    Do they demand your respect? If you ask them, most of them will agree that they receive more adulation than they deserve. People worship them of their own freewill and when they fail on the field, they are ready to even demolish their homes. Lets also grant cricketers the same freewill to respect or rebuff any award that people or the nation bestows on them.

  34. Have you checked the fake IPL player blog… its too hilarious. Lordie Jai Ho!!!

  35. dhoni is anice fellow but bhajji really sucks

  36. @ greatbong:
    In response to your reply on my comment:

    I did not count referring to Sreesanth as racist because you are of the same race as him.

    And in the same vein, considering I’m the same race as you and Harbhajan and Dhoni means that I can’t be racist against you all. And in any case, referring to people as idiots does not make one racist.

  37. And why do you think I have to accept your assertion that you cannot make a racist remark to someone of your own race? Why do you think that the word “idiot” is not a racist insult but “monkey” is. Just because Symonds says it is so right? Remember that McGrath called Sanath Jayasurya a “black monkey”. Now do you get the racist angle here? The adjective maybe? If I say that someone of a darker color (harbhajan) racially insulting a fairer person (Symonds) flies in the face of what is conventionally defined as the direction of racial abuse, will you accept my contention? Remember that Symonds likes to think of himself as “black” but noone in India would think him to be one. In that respect, he is very different from say Fidel Edwards.

  38. Wow! Wonderful blog dada! I just happened to stumble upon it yesterday. Btw, I was just wondering if you guys have a degree is ass whopping or something 🙂 Simply amazing! Darooon! Keep up the good work!

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