GooGooGaGaChoChweetChweet

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[Update: Many of the video links are dead links as Youtube seems to have suspended many accounts of users who have uploaded Hindi movie songs.]

Yes folks. Valentine’s Day is almost here. Which means its time to show how much you love your lovey-doveys. And as we all know there is nothing that expresses ethereal longing as purely as expensive greetings cards, shiny chocolates and overpriced flowers. But, this year, before you rush over to the Archie’s outlets either to empty your wallet or to try to pelt stones at the store and harass its customers, let me take a moment (and a few more) of your time to tell you of a new Valentine’s Day gift-item that is sure to arouse your interests.

Among other things.

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me present GooGooGaGaChoChweetChweet, a CD of the very best, and I mean the very best of Valentine’s Day music brought to you by GB Industries —yes the same corporation that ushered in a lingerie revolution in India with its “Victor Banerjee Secrets” line of sensual inner-wear.

Oh no you say. Been there, heard that. “Valentine Day ke din main kahe doon ankehi”. “Abh mujhe raat din tera hi khayal hain.” Every music company with a CD burner releases these sappy tracks around this time of the year, hoping to rake in a quick buck.

But wait. This one is different.

GooGooGaGaChoChweetChweet is a musical offering to the spirit of Valentine’s Day and to the myriad shades of this special date. Whether it be the sheer madness of first love or the tired desperation of the thirty-seventh, whether it be a declaration of a “special friendship” or its consummation, whether it be an expression of desire for your wife or for her hot friend, whether it be the warm fuzziness of a candle-lit dinner or the fuzzy warmness of the darkened bedroom, nothing and I mean nothing captures each aspect of Valentine’s Day as accurately and as inclusively as this musical medley, drawn almost exclusively and eclectically from Hindi movies from the 1980s and the 1990s.

Still confused?

Don’t blame yourself. Love does that to all of us.

Just read on as we give you a teaser into what we have for you in our exclusive collection.

Track 1: Mamma Mia Pom Pom [Video Link] Movie: Justice Chowdhury

Rarely has love been expressed as poetically as in the lines “Mamma Mia Pom Pom”. If Valentines’ isn’t the time for pressing each other’s accelerators (“accelerator aur dabayo”) and doing “pom poms” while jumping around as if one’s pants are on fire, then pray tell me what is?

Track 4: Aoooaaaa [Video Link] Movie: Shola Aur Shabnam

Yeh ishq naheen hain asaan. What if the girl you desire is “kisi aur ka”? Imagine you are a 30-something NCC cadet and walk into a club to find her dirty-dancing with someone like Monish Behl. What do you do? Just watch Govinda as he wins the girl over with his awesome dance moves and spreads so much passion in the air that even the Hiterlian Major (Anupam Kher) and the Commissioner ( Alok Nath) can do nothing but scream Aoooaaa in lust and kiss each other.

Track 5: Oii Amma [Video Link] Movie: Mawaali

Love soars. Saris fly. Very few songs cut to the chase as quick as this song featuring Jeetendra and Jaya Samajwadi Prada, leaving no doubt in the minds of people that “love is all about never having to say you are in a sari“.

Track 8: Are You Ready? [Video Link] Movie: Naakabandi

When the moment comes and your lover is dropping signals left and right that she is willing to “give it up”, are you “ready”? I mean seriously. Are you “ready”? Or do you have to say “Makanakamakanaka Jhingjhing Chakamaka” and get a whole troop of choreographed vampires and snake-frying orientals dance behind you as you reach inside your wallet trying to find that blasted rubber you thought you had there.

Track 12: Aaj Hum Tum O Sanam [Video Link] Movie: Saathi

Who says Valentine’s Day is only for heterosexual love? No-one. This lovely song from the movie “Saathi” in which Aditya Pancholi and Mohsin Khan (a Pakistani opening batsman famous for partnerships with a certain Mud-Ass-Ar ) play two very happy friends, making no secret of their preference for each other even as the heroine pines for them, is dedicated to all you Adams and Steves.

Track 13: Sorry Sorry [Video Link ] Movie: Zaalim

Face it. All of us have, at some point of our lives, screwed up our love interactions—compared the stamina of our current lover with our ex-s, written the wrong name in a romantic card and forgotten to clear the cache after using our partner’s machine to surf the Net. Next time such a thing happens, do as this song does. However do remember to get the Geisha girls beforehand.

Track 14: For Adults Only [Video Link] Movie: Aakhri Ghulam

I am sure that I can speak for all guys when I say that they do love it when girls tell them their life stories, hopes and aspirations– memories of family weddings, outings to the circus and desire to have two kids. But what they most appreciate is the “one-track-mind” girl whose book of life is, as the song goes, for “Adults Only” (preferably with illustrations)

Track 16 (Bonus): The Condom Song [Video Link]

One thing to remember during Valentine’s Day is safety. Which is why we include the public service “Condom Song” in our collection ,combining as it does public service, information and viral nirodh dance moves in a way that is extremely rare.

We have not told you the details of our full list of course.

As the song goes: Thoda intezar ka maza lijiye.

Oops I didnt give away one more track did I?

Our operators are online, waiting for your call. Order now and we will be eternally grateful to you. Call within the next fifteen minutes and we will be doubly eternally grateful to you. Yes that’s right. At no extra cost.

So what are you waiting for?

Let’s spread the love.

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51 thoughts on “GooGooGaGaChoChweetChweet

  1. How about men proclaiming their love for their lady love with a ‘Main laila lalila chillaoonga kurta faadke….’

    Or girls can wooing guys with the song ‘Oi amma oi amma kya karta hai, ladka hoke ladki se kyun darta hai’….

    Are these a part of the track list….or will they be included in the next GooGooGaGaChoChweetChweet Version2.0?

  2. “โ€œVictor Banerjee Secretsโ€ line of sensual inner-wear”
    LOL ๐Ÿ™‚

    And please I will not have anyone say anything (good or bad) about Jeetu and Jaya ki Jodi. I get spasm everytime they are mentioned.

  3. ROFLMAO..!!

    but hw come u missed —
    “Hay baarish ho rahi hain… Its raining… raining… raining
    Mera dil ro raha hain… Its paining… paining… paining”
    by the one and only Anu Malik…!
    ๐Ÿ˜€

    on an unrelated note —
    Gotta start collecting some rocks to throw at the nearest Archies’…..

    “THIS IS AGAINST OUR CULTURE!”

  4. Ohmigawd. That was awesome.

    You can get a second PhD with your encyclopedic knowledge of Indian pop culture.

    If someone rips this compilation, I’ll torrent it and GB Industries can make money Radiohead style.

  5. @peshwa : Yes, gaane ka gana aur english bhi seekhe. A-new Mallik’s educational compilation.

    How bout

    * Calling your lovey dovey by newer taxonomies: Tamma tamma loge [Boppy Da’s Gaan in Thanedar]. The reference is not in the lyrics but in the movie Sunjoy Dutt calls her Madhuri her Tamma tamma.

    * The best love itenary: By Raven Tandon and Eggshay Kumar “Subah se lekar Shaam Tak, Shaam se phir subah tak,…. mujhe pyar karo” [Mohra]

    * Of Birds and Chillies “Tota Mirchi khaa Gaya” [Suno Sasurjee]

    * Perfect way to woo your beloved and enhance your hindi alphabets “A AA EE” [Raja Babu]

  6. God damn GB, you even remember Zaalim, one of Akshay’s best. And oh, that movie had another song called ‘Bambai se rail chali’ after which Mohan joshi rewards the lead dancer with a bullet in the chest, heh heh.

    Anyway, back to the post, superb as always & a mighty fine compilation. And by the way, Kishore da pronounced “accelerator” as “axe-i-lator” in that Justice Chowdhury song.

  7. Me likey ๐Ÿ™‚

    Is there an option of ordering ‘personalised’ selections? For me, nothing beats the absolute romance of:

    “tere baap ko, maine dekha bandra station pe, toh bola uncle, namastey. Bapu bola, beta ghar tu aana, chaai peee ku jaana. Iska matlab teri meri family ko… rishta manzoor, chal picture ko chaltey”

    No love compilation for me is complete without that one.

  8. Amazing GB, How do you remember all these gems???? I have listened to each of them-having the same kind of sophisticated musical taste as you do ๐Ÿ˜‰ – but never rememberd any of them till now…
    I can recall only one at the moment that you may look at including for the Volume-2. Salman Khan’s lesson on vowels , with partial nudity theme- ” Arrey re zara A, Arrey re zara O , Arrey re zara E— Just love me”.

    And what about an Anthem for the Bajrangis also, V-Day being their D-day. “Nonononono…Ishq ke gali vich NO ENTRY”!!!!!

    Oh and BTW, mereko ek CD bhijwa dena..maska marke ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Not a single song from “The Bhojpuri Spice Girls” ….I am offended. Either include “Nimbua” or we shall demand the ban on this CD in Chapra and Darbhanga jilaas in Bihar ! In today’s modern world, girls often are unafraid to woo boys. With respect to that spirit, “Nimbua” should have been included. Arnabda …I take offence at you been anti-Bihari and anti-feminist ….aaargggg !

  10. Now that’s what I (or rather, Bollywood) call “Love Songs Collection”.

    It’s impossible to limit comment on each song to this space. But the initial reactions:
    1. Although the song is “Pom Pom”, they are running on the road. Is “taking it slowly” the message here?
    2. The “Naaka bandi” (these are 2 different words in the song) singer. Who is that cuckoo?
    3. Not a single song from Prabhuji made it into the collection? Or is that the part of surprise?
    4. Extremely happy to see that “Aai aai ya” part was not written in subtitles for track 13.

  11. I don’t need your album, No Thanks!, I have the complete collection of Anu Malik’s awesome romantic songs which serves me very well!

    I don’t even think your collection comes anywhere close to the brilliance in HIS collection!

    Sample this in one of his Akshay kumar-Priyanka Chopra songs – ‘Do me a favorrr, let’s play Holiii’ (repeated 135 1/2 times in the song)! ‘Do me a favor’, questioning – which women like; ‘let’s play Holiii’ – now he is gettin raunchy…see what I mean about being the best composer ever!

    Please GB, don’t try to sell second rate products like this!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. Funtastic collection…
    Sorry but no time for music rightnow… gotts stone some ‘holemarks’ ‘archives’.. Where is my khakhi chaddi….. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Great post GB….

  13. This is one of your funniest posts in a while. Still can’t get over gems like ‘Victor Bannerjee Secrets’ and ‘Adams and Steves’. Making the condom song the bonus track will definitely up the sales of the CD.

  14. ————–
    3. Not a single song from Prabhuji made it into the collection? Or is that the part of surprise?
    ————–

    Ha caught you – you fair weather Prabhuji fan – you blasphemous bhakt you.

    If you were a true believer you would have seen the full “For Adults Only” song and would have noticed the arrival of the world’s ‘only adult’ at the end.

    You should be more involved in your bhakti, dear friend, else you know what happened to Lamboo Aata!!

  15. @Swati: Where would we do without dedicated customers like yourself?

    @Ramya: Just so many I can put in a post. Will do such collections in the future too.

    @Gurdas: I am sure Amar Singh feels the same way.

    @Jeet: Haan laag raha hoon.

    @Peshwa: Maybe in some other collection. Incidentally, that song isnt visually as spectacular as these specimens.

    @100rabh: GB industries will release more such CDs only if response for initial offering is good.

    @Saurabh: Yes I am not so original am I?

    @Sriram: Thank you. I can guarantee that it will definitely be more popular in terms of readership than my actual thesis.

    @Quarklore: Hmm

    @Sudipto: Cassettes? Surely you do not think us to be downmarket.

    @Vivek4mJH: Yes I remember. That song has been saved for another appropriate post…it deserves a throne of its own.

    @TheWalker: Have been trying to get hold of that on Youtube. No success.

    @Akhil: Yes there is.

    @Sid..No More the Kid: Never can get these songs out of my head. They dont make them like this any more.

    @Sam: I prefer I 1 Love 4 You 3 from “Aadmi”

    @Abegprobon, Dhananjay, Shashwat, Kailas: ๐Ÿ™‚

    @Dibyo: Kindly recall my stance against Bhojpuri music ever since Prabhuji’s movies were banned in the UP heartland.

    @Amey: As Balbrain pointed out, how did you think I wont have a Prabhuji song? Please look at the last 30 seconds of “For Adults Only” as Prabhuji with a dog enters, looking just like Mr. Kit Walker (the Phantom) and his faithful mutt, (Egg) Devil respectively.

    @Kiran: Hmm

    @Tarzan,ArSENik, Surendra: Thanks

    @Balbrain : ๐Ÿ™‚ For Bhakts only.

  16. This is a great collection GB. I think you should come up with a volume 2. Below are some suggestions:

    bichchu yeh bichchu mujhe kaat khayega (chamatkar)

    sarkaye liyo khatiya (some Govinda movie)

    You are my chicken fry, you are my fish fry
    Kabhi na kehna kudiye bye bye bye (Rock Dancer)

    O miss de de kiss. Aaya hai 86 (Love 86)

    Mana ke college mein, padhna chahiye…romaaance ka bhi ek lecture hona chahiye (Jaan tere naam)

    On that note, Happy Valentine’s day!

  17. Aah, I was looking for a song with Prabhuji from start to end. Something like the legendary, “Classic Dance of Love”. Even the Kabutar song…

    BTW, the comparison with the “Man who cannot die” with the “Hero who cannot retire” is perfect. But that is much younger Prabhuji than 21st Phantom. Maybe 22nd.

  18. Such outfits, such immortal lyrics! Uff, kahan gaye woh din – when they used to sew up Jeetu in his pants and Sridevi was styled by an army of drag queens.

    For GGGGCCC v.2, here’s my submission

    Jhompri mein charpai from the classic Mawaali. Enjoy!

  19. brilliant as usual.. love yr posts.. some ofthe 80’s and 90’s stuff makes me nostalgic but today that reference to nakabandi song was brilliant.
    sridevi in a blue gown (?)
    yu rock man

  20. It still amazes me how a bogus concept like Valentine’s Day is given so much importance, both by its supporters and its detractors. Sometimes it kind of puts a heavy burden on people…as if they are supposed to do something expensive for their loved ones on this day. But people should really wake up and read behind all that marketing crap of “You dont wanna be left behind, do you? What are you buying her this Valentine’s Day”, and ensure that it doesn’t affect them.

    An interesting alternate perspective.

    So it is true GB. This is a great day for marketing any kinda crap packaged under that Valentines Day GB. Nice montage of 80s songs btw along with the usual great subtle humour.

  21. Yes, finally a meaningful compilation for Valentine’s day. I would just add one more to the list, a great song from Qatil with Ranjit, Shakti Kapoor with wonderful facial expressions and Silk Smitha going ‘Bango Bango Bango’.

  22. @TheWalker

    What movie is that song from ?

    โ€œtere baap ko, maine dekha bandra station pe, toh bola uncle, namastey. Bapu bola, beta ghar tu aana, chaai peee ku jaana. Iska matlab teri meri family koโ€ฆ rishta manzoor, chal picture ko chalteyโ€

    I need the MP3! Pronto!

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